Haylee8467_fml

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Haylee8467_fml's favorite FMLs

By Tinker-Bell - 21/11/2008 03:41 - France

Today, when I woke up, my husband was already up. Thinking I'd heard him in the hall, I yelled out, "Come on, don't be shy, bring your dick back in here right now!" A voice then replied, "He's gone out to get some bread." It was my mother-in-law. FML

agreeclassic 48 256

vote type 1 18 026

By Stickysituation - 23/01/2013 18:44 - United States - Depew

Today, my friend set me up on a blind date, to get my mind off having been recently broken up with. The guy was perfect: tall, muscular, handsome. But while we were watching a movie, I saw him dig around in his nose, then wipe his finger on my pants. FML

agreeclassic 39 758

vote type 1 4 509

By itsrathersmall - 15/01/2013 21:58 - United States - Fargo

Today, I learned my neighbor can access my wireless printer from his house after it started printing off pictures of what I'm assuming is his penis. FML

agreeclassic 48 155

vote type 1 7 735

Nope

By Anonymous - 15/01/2013 17:45 - United States

Today, I finally felt ready to have sex for the first time, with my boyfriend of nearly 8 months. When I told him, things became intimate and pants came off. He then looked at me and said, "Yeah, I can't do this." The rest of the night was spent in awkward silence. FML

agreeclassic 48 898

vote type 1 6 680

Attempted romance

By ItRainedOutside - this FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Saint Petersburg

Today, after three years with my dream girl, I decided to pop the question by making her complete a scavenger hunt ending in her finding me, suit and everything, by the park bench where we had our first kiss. She came home tired and, instead of following the clues, decided to watch TV all day. FML

agreeclassic 35 928

vote type 1 5 539