When you run out of kibble... By FML Approved - 19/10/2017 20:30 Say it isn't so! I agree, your life sucks 429 You deserved it 101 Share Tweet Share
Today I asked my mother-in-law to borrow a plunger, so she asked what I needed it for. "Poop," I replied. "I've told you this before," she huffed, "you have to poop a little and then flush, poop a little and flush. You can't go all at once." I can't even shit right for this woman. FML I agree, your life sucks 5 422 You deserved it 556
Today, I was so bored, I sewed my name into my underwear. FML I agree, your life sucks 26 588 You deserved it 13 903
Today, my son gave me a bottle of shampoo for my birthday. I'm as bald as a coot. FML I agree, your life sucks 34 725 You deserved it 3 474
Today, my boyfriend was buying a new hockey stick; to test it out he started hitting a ball around the aisle and decided to shoot it back into its bin. Instead the ball hit me dead in the mouth, giving me a fat lip. Instead of consoling me, my boyfriend yelled "GOAL!" FML I agree, your life sucks 36 955 You deserved it 6 696
Today, at work my boss told me I have been late, under-productive, and using up a lot of sick days. He says my job is on the line. My reason for barely showing up at work: I've been on maternity leave for 6 weeks. FML I agree, your life sucks 38 477 You deserved it 3 702
Today, as I was driving, a bird swooped down, right in front of my car. I didn't have enough time to react, and so I had to listen to my wife cry the rest of the way home. She kept talking about how it bounced off the windshield and how it probably had a family. FML I agree, your life sucks 25 754 You deserved it 2 909
Did not expect that.