When I try to quit junk food By Lewis - 08/12/2018 18:00 I'm not a quitter! I agree, your life sucks 281 You deserved it 94 Share Tweet Share
Today, the guy I've been dating told me with a wink that before he'll go on any more dates, he'd require me to take a series of "oral exams" to prove I'm right for him. I think he actually expected that to work. NEXT. FML I agree, your life sucks 48 596 You deserved it 6 178
Today, I was walking down the street hand in hand with my girlfriend. I couldn't help but stare at a gorgeous girl as she bent down to pick something up. It was such a great sight, I didn't notice the metal telephone pole directly in my path. FML I agree, your life sucks 12 409 You deserved it 102 775
Today, while finishing shopping with my kids, my female best friend and I were accosted by a street preacher. He screamed that we were an abomination, having biracial children was a sin against nature, and that we were ruining America. Not only we are not gay, he made my kids cry. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 904 You deserved it 352
Today, I was at an awards dinner. I whispered into my wife's ear that she looked really pretty. She whispered in my ear that I should stop clapping so loud, because I was embarrassing her. FML I agree, your life sucks 46 867 You deserved it 6 947
Today, I spent all day at the hospital with my grandma for some tests. When I drove her back home she decided to thank me with $50. Knowing she is unemployed, I told her I couldn't take a whole $50. She replied with "Ungrateful, just like your mother", then took the money and left. FML I agree, your life sucks 39 723 You deserved it 4 613
Today, I had a first date planned. He texted saying he was sick and couldn't make it. Two hours later, his Twitter account said otherwise. FML I agree, your life sucks 36 640 You deserved it 4 329
Yup that's me when there is white chocolate in the house 😋