When dinner is late By Lewis - 27/01/2019 00:30 FEED ME NOW! I agree, your life sucks 356 You deserved it 119 Share Tweet Share
Today, my husband thought it would be funny to scare me by maniacally zooming in and out of traffic while we were on his motorcycle. His mood turned to anger when I nervously admitted to having voided my bowels. FML I agree, your life sucks 25 876 You deserved it 3 598
Today, I realized why the lady I had complimented the night before on Halloween about her amazing one-armed costume, looked so hurt. She is literally missing an arm. I'm an asshole. FML I agree, your life sucks 37 638 You deserved it 14 255
Today, my boyfriend of 4 months broke up with me, saying things are moving "too fast". All I did was tell my 3 year-old that my boyfriend's parents are his new grandma and grandpa. FML I agree, your life sucks 145 You deserved it 3 560
Today, my cat got out. I was chasing him in the field behind my backyard, barefoot while wearing PJs, yelling my head off like a raving lunatic. The field soil was sludge, and my feet sunk right in with every step. After I got him, I heard a snap of a soda can. My neighbours were there the whole time, watching. FML I agree, your life sucks 780 You deserved it 314
Today, I somehow managed to FaceTime my crush instead of texting him. I panicked, dropped my phone, then answered the call with an unflattering close-up of my forehead. FML I agree, your life sucks 178 You deserved it 374
Today, my drunken self became a vaguely racist poet. I am now the author of a four-page poem entitled "Chocolate Men". FML I agree, your life sucks 34 977 You deserved it 17 940
Make your own ******* dinner!!
😅