Intimacy: What a dick

What a dick

By Anonymous - 03/11/2011 07:29 - United States

Today, I ran into my boyfriend's dad. His exact words were, "Call me when you're ready to feel what a real man can do to you." FML

agreeclassic 69 737

vote type 1 5 181

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Similar FMLs

By Anonymous - 22/05/2010 23:22 - United States

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, my dad called my cell. He ended the phone call with, "and tell your boyfriend to shut up, I can hear him moaning." FML

agreeclassic 17 591

vote type 1 47 256

You have the same voice!

By EternalBlossom - 14/07/2015 05:03 - United States

Today, I had decided that I was ready to have sex with my boyfriend. So, I called him and told him how naughty I felt, only to realize that I had called my dad. FML

agreeclassic 28 540

vote type 1 24 119

By mydadsgonnakillme - 08/02/2013 07:13 - United States - Santa Barbara

Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my overprotective father. My boyfriend started out with, "Sir, it is an honor to be your daughter's sexual partner." FML

agreeclassic 64 593

vote type 1 12 448

By iris - 18/05/2012 23:01 - Portugal - Lisbon

Today, I brought my boyfriend home, and I introduced him to my parents. Afterwards, I took him to my room so we could have some "bonding" time. Right as things got pretty intense, I heard my dad yell, "Stop faking, honey." FML

agreeclassic 14 256

vote type 1 36 309

Uh... Okay?

By Champion sucker - 11/08/2018 06:00

Today, I was going out with my boyfriend after recently coming out. On my way out the door, my dad looked me dead in the eyes and said, "Suck that dick like a champ tonight, son." FML

agreeclassic 5 055

vote type 1 1 839

By Anonymous - 04/01/2014 23:13 - Canada - Hamilton

Today, my boyfriend met my parents. Within minutes, my dad managed to verbally sever his balls and reduce him to tears, "just for fun" apparently. FML

agreeclassic 49 719

vote type 1 5 704

By ohgod... - 02/04/2012 02:18 - Canada - Magog

Today, while my boyfriend and I were getting intimate, he called me "Mom." FML

agreeclassic 44 229

vote type 1 3 439

By _schaden_freude - 27/12/2015 17:31 - United Kingdom - Ashford

Today, my boyfriend's dad came onto me. I was shocked and awkwardly tried to exit the situation. My boyfriend then sprang out and started shouting at me. Apparently, it was a "test" to see if I would still be attracted to him in 30 years. I failed. What. The. Fuck. FML

agreeclassic 30 440

vote type 1 1 841

By Oh God - 24/05/2018 06:00

Today, I met my new boyfriend’s family for the first time. Unfortunately for me, his dad walked in to ask what we wanted for dinner while we were having sex. Even worse was that my boyfriend kept going while his dad was there, and his dad later said he was glad I was “the woman”. FML

agreeclassic 5 166

vote type 1 1 466

Yikes!

By Anonymous - 31/08/2010 05:21 - United States

Today, I talked to my boyfriend's dad for the first time. One of the first things that he said to me was, "So, I hear you're a screamer." FML

agreeclassic 42 279

vote type 1 7 259

damadrappa 4

Thursday 3 November 2011 12:11

Someones jealous

GuitarFail123 9

Thursday 3 November 2011 12:11

wow... thats umm interesting to say the least....

Comments

The_9th_Doctor 18

Monday 16 September 2013 17:46

did you?

cd8919 12

Wednesday 9 October 2013 5:21

Compliment or insult your choice

Baller_Bob 17

Tuesday 18 March 2014 19:36

Oh lawd

fiveforfighting 26

Sunday 29 March 2015 10:59

Family reunions might be a bit awkward. This is late but I hope all has been wee since then OP!

DaRito 25

Wednesday 8 April 2015 2:21

He's probably joking around, parents do that.

silentxninja 13

Wednesday 6 May 2015 23:49

That's really inappropriate and creepy, even if he was joking.

kittykat0619 11

Monday 19 September 2016 9:58

Sounds like my ex boyfriends dad lmao damn

lccc_ 18

Friday 23 June 2017 5:24

thats so disusting.

J15237 25

Thursday 28 May 2020 17:54

I hope that you told your man to handle that shit. That's completely uncalled for

randybryant799 20

Thursday 27 January 2022 0:00

Yikes. That's just so gross.

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

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