Intimacy: Today, my dad gave me the sex talk. After telling me all the...

By accident - 14/02/2014 22:41 - United States - San Francisco

Today, my dad gave me the sex talk. After telling me all the stuff I already knew, he told me never to use Durex condoms. He said, "They break a lot. That's the only reason you're around today, really." then chuckled to himself. FML

agreeclassic 61 086

vote type 1 5 838

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By condom_kid - 27/07/2009 14:34 - United States

Today, my father pulled me aside as I was heading off to my girlfriend's house. He said, "Next time you have sex, don't leave the tied up condom in its wrapper inside your shorts pocket, otherwise your mother might find it again as she's folding laundry." FML

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mea_iloveskiing 26

Saturday 15 February 2014 5:13

I'm sure he loves you :)

thief1434 23

Saturday 15 February 2014 5:14

The question is, what condoms did he recommend?

Comments

DurexSux 5

Saturday 15 February 2014 13:28

He's not wrong :p

skyeyez9 24

Saturday 15 February 2014 15:27

Well, you are alive and here. He and your mom loved you enough to bring you into this world and not abort you. I was conceived at a party with lots of alcohol and debauchery involved or so I was told. So I was an "oops" baby as well. Not a big deal.

sporkadork 7

Saturday 15 February 2014 17:51

Its ok, I was an accident, as was my brother. My sister was the only one who was planned. They wanted three kids, just slightly different timing. I think a lot more people are "surprises" than they realize.

gennyv 29

Saturday 15 February 2014 17:54

Funny how he told you on Valentine's Day ;)

LalaDee561 8

Saturday 15 February 2014 18:00

It's OK OP. I was a mistake too. I came five years earlier than what my mom wanted, so don't feel bad. That's ****** up though.

worldclassrager 39

Saturday 15 February 2014 18:16

Maybe he used that so that you could be around? Don't worry about it...at least you weren't aborted...

Robert1989 9

Saturday 15 February 2014 20:35

well at least we know your mon dont swollow.

havok87 11

Sunday 16 February 2014 0:05

Durex do suck.

Cadillac4427 8

Sunday 16 February 2014 5:02

Magnum is the way to go dear.. and they feel great.- Should it feel creepy? A grown woman telling this to teenager who essentially might be under 18? Where is Doc Bastard when you need him for advice ?