Love Today, my boyfriend found cake in my belly button. FML - FML

hungry - 18/08/2016 16:17 - New Zealand - North Shore

Today, my boyfriend found cake in my belly button. FML

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Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. …

leafynitemare 24

Friday 19 August 2016 14:25

Please tell me he didn't eat it.

leafynitemare 24

Friday 19 August 2016 14:25

Please tell me he didn't eat it.

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Awkward Pokémon Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, my family is placing bets on my being pregnant. I'm experiencing a very painful miscarriage and no one knows. I didn't want to eat a pre-made gas station salad when I visited for lunch and apparently the only explanation could be pregnancy, not that I didn't want to die from food poisoning. FML

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Today, I went to a bar for some drinks. A guy looked me up and down, gave me a suggestive smile, then asked for my name and number. I'd have been a little less creeped out if he hadn't been standing beside me at the urinal the whole time. FML

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Today, I came home from a stay at my girlfriend's place. My little brother stepped on my bag and accidentally switched my vibrator on. I told him the buzzing sound was my electric toothbrush. He went to the bathroom and came back with the toothbrush. He won't stop asking what's in my bag. FML

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Today, I listened to a recording of a woman saying, "I love you" for about 30 mins straight. That's apparently the only way I can feel loved. FML

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Today, I was let go from work because they need "younger people". I'm 19 and I work at a flower market. FML

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Today, I walked in on my soon-to-be-ex-husband with his coworker (who we'd always argued about) bent over in front of him. Both of them buck ass naked. He was supposed to be watching our two year-old daughter, who was in another room eating applesauce by herself. She was drenched in applesauce from head to toe. FML

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