Just Hanging On By FML Approved - 20/10/2017 20:30 It'll get better. Eventually. I agree, your life sucks 402 You deserved it 108 Share Tweet Share
Today, I tried to sneak up on my girlfriend who was sitting in her car with one of her girlfriends. I snuck up to the driver's side window and tried to startle her by banging on the window. The window was down. My thumb went right in her eye. She has to wear a patch for 2 weeks. FML I agree, your life sucks 16 195 You deserved it 69 415
Today, I was singing while lying upside down chewing gum. My dad was trying to focus on the current football game and hushed me. I yelled, "No!" resulting in my gum becoming lodged in my windpipe. I shut up after all. FML I agree, your life sucks 7 296 You deserved it 52 284
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. When I asked why, she replied with "You don't go out anymore. All you do is lay in bed." I've had the flu for the past week. FML I agree, your life sucks 39 499 You deserved it 2 567
Today, I attempted to have amazing birthday sex with my boyfriend in his dorm room. Everything was going great until we tried switching positions. I hit my head so hard on the bunk above his bed that I gave myself a concussion, and blacked out. Needless to say, the moment was ruined. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 821 You deserved it 350
Today, my mom and I were looking at pictures from the beach. She goes, "That is a REALLY ugly picture of Michelle" (my cousin). The picture was of me. FML I agree, your life sucks 38 160 You deserved it 2 656
Today, I got a call from a job I had applied for. Everything went great until I realized I had applied to the wrong location, across town. I'm so broke, I went to the interview anyway. It will cost me more to pay for the gas to drive there to work, than what I will actually make. FML I agree, your life sucks 12 136 You deserved it 2 285
If that was my kid, I'd tell him to get up and walk.