FML's guide to a stress-free St Patrick's Day By Louis - 17/03/2017 18:15 - France - Paris Savour the flavor of the day, but be careful out there! I agree, your life sucks 722 You deserved it 196 Share Tweet Share
Today, I was in bed feeling sad and depressed because I hate my career and several major life choices I made for the wrong reasons. My husband, who had been trying to cheer me up all day, put the icing on the cake by saying, “Is this a bad time to mention the blowjob you promised me yesterday?” FML I agree, your life sucks 598 You deserved it 325
Today, I hit it off with a girl at a club and I brought her back to my place. I was sure I was finally going to score, until my useless cat attacked her as we walked upstairs. She fell down the stairs and dislocated her ankle. Just my luck. FML I agree, your life sucks 26 936 You deserved it 5 180
Today, my fiancé's kids say they never want to come back to our house because I’m “mean” and have "too many rules." Rules such as brushing teeth twice a day, flushing the toilet after every use, no food allowed in the bedrooms, and no sleeping in until 2pm. Guess that makes me unreasonable. FML I agree, your life sucks 961 You deserved it 204
Today, after staying up late all week to get work done, I arrived at my job having accomplished all my goals. In my sleep-deprived stupor, I completely forgot to bring the briefcase that had all of the evidence of that hard work. FML I agree, your life sucks 20 444 You deserved it 2 671
Today, I found out that my doctor got mad I was prescribed Suboxone. Why? He had me in patches and pills when I wanted neither. I found relief and he took it as an issue, but this morning he wrote, "I know you're a druggie" in my file. I've never touched street drugs, and the cherry on top was, "You homeless yet?" A DOCTOR. FML I agree, your life sucks 469 You deserved it 88
Today, my girlfriend's sister tried to pull the dog jaw prank on me, accidentally biting my finger in the process. Now she's mad at me because her tooth got chipped when I pulled my hand back, completely disregarding the fact that my finger needed stitches from her bite. FML I agree, your life sucks 466 You deserved it 80