Poopoo peepee, Awkward Health Family values

Family values

Anonymous - - United States - Houston

Today, my future father-in-law showed everyone a picture of his poop because it was "shaped like a banana." My fiancé's whole family thought it was funny and "looked more like a banana than last time." FML

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The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

Thanks for the info

Anonymous -

Today, my mother told my boyfriend a cute story about me when I was little. The one where my cousin and I were caught pooping in a urinal in the church basement. FML

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Limited edition prank

Anonymous - - United States - Hopkinsville

Today, as always, my boyfriend has the ability to pop his eyeballs out of his eye sockets. He thought it'd be funny for me to wake up face-to-face with the disgusting sight. The shit in my bowels did an early Thanksgiving Day parade straight into my underwear. FML

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Double sus

Turnipseed3 - - United States

Today, I was sitting on the toilet, pregnant as ever, and really sick. I asked my fiancé to bring me a pair of clean underwear. He did so and brought me some lacy underwear. They weren't mine. FML

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Close encounters

Pinkie - - United States

Today, I had to announce to the whole house that I was going the bathroom, because the lock on the door is broken. Before I had the chance to wipe, my dad loudly burst through the door, stark bollock naked, to take a shower. FML

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How could you?

Ashlee - - United States

Today, while on a date with my boyfriend, he broke up with me. The reason why? Because I took a dump in his bathroom and "that's inappropriate for girls." FML

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kb - 18/11/2013 06:38 - United States

Today, my mother gave me a bottle of stool softeners as a gift at my baby shower. FML

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Sneaky

Anonymous - - Canada - Owen Sound

Today, I caught my dad sneaking a drink of whiskey outside, shortly before my wedding. I asked if he was seriously getting drunk at a time like this. He looked at me and scoffed, "It's the only way I'm gonna get through this stupid shit." FML

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Well done!

Anonymous - - United States

Today, I was at the mall with my young daughter. I hate pooping in public but I really had to go so I brought her in with me. Thinking we were alone, I started to go and my daughter yelled, "Good job Mommy, you're using the potty like a big girl!" I then heard laughing. FML

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confsused - 16/12/2013 17:49 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I found out that my dad is actually my uncle, and vice-versa. FML

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Why did you tell me that?

mymomplucksbutthair - - United States

Today, my mom confessed to me that she used to pluck my step-dad's butt hair. I hope the brain-gods delete this obnoxious mental picture. FML

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iOceanus 18

Thursday 2 May 2013 18:52

Poop a watermelon. Your poop will definitely win!

Ambient25 24

Thursday 2 May 2013 20:31

I pooped a Nickelback album once...it still sounded the same

Clove9990 9

Friday 3 May 2013 0:41

That's just gross

lilims123 7

Friday 3 May 2013 1:38

Oh shizzz

Katie_alvarez3 4

Friday 3 May 2013 1:41

Lol I cannot deal with people. :P But I cannot believe that he showed a pic!

Ray_of_midnight 22

Friday 3 May 2013 1:53

"If you've ever uttered the words, 'Come look at this before I flush it,' you just might be a redneck." --Jeff Foxworthy

Zehla 7

Friday 3 May 2013 2:01

I'm sorry but that is disgusting. I will never understand why some men feel the need to document their craps, and I thank my lucky stars that my boyfriend has enough class to not do that.