Kids, Pregnancy, Family and Awkward: Classic grandma

Classic grandma

By Anonymous - 22/07/2024 02:00 - United States

Today, I announced my fourth pregnancy, this time with twins. I heard my mother mutter, “Finally two kids from the same dad.” FML

agreeclassic 109

vote type 1 1 138

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Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. More…

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Keep it in your pants

By bad brother - 04/10/2023 11:00

Today, my sister-in-law announced that she’s pregnant. With my kid. And the doctor thinks it might be twins. FML

agreeclassic 102

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Think of the environment

By Anonyname - 18/05/2014 19:14 - United Kingdom

Today, my husband and I announced at a family get-together that I'm pregnant with our fourth child. My dad sighed, and spent the rest of the evening acting moody, and eventually muttering about how he'd raised a "damned broodmare." FML

agreeclassic 43 918

vote type 1 10 619

In this economy?

By Anonymous - 30/05/2025 02:00 - United Kingdom

Today, the good news is that my girlfriend is pregnant. The bad news is that twins run in her family. Worse, so do triplets, and I just recently lost my job. FML

agreeclassic 377

vote type 1 188

By Sam - 10/10/2017 16:00

Today, I went to my first ultrasound appointment. The daughter I was hoping for is actually going to be boy triplets. FML

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Classic Dave

By not the mama - 24/10/2020 02:01 - United States - Hesperia

Today, after years of trying, I got the wonderful news that my husband is going to be a father. Too bad I’m not the mother. FML

agreeclassic 1 700

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Build your own

By Anonymous - 05/09/2024 13:00 - United States - Maryland Heights

Today, after my wife gave birth to another of our daughters, she announced that this was the last one. When I reminded her I still needed a son to carry on my name, she replied, "Well, you've got four girls. You want a boy? Birth him yourself!" FML

agreeclassic 102

vote type 1 1 830

Sex Ed is a mess

By Anonymous - 21/10/2022 12:00

Today, my daughter told me that she’s pregnant with twins. It would be an exciting piece of news, except for the fact that she’s a sophomore in high school. FML

agreeclassic 1 217

vote type 1 195

Food for thought

By Anonymous - 08/11/2012 06:13 - United States - Houston

Today, I was told I will be having twins; this came as a shock since there are no twins in my family. When I asked my mom about it, she said that she wasn't surprised and not to worry about it because she had "absorbed her twin" and that the problem would "take care of itself." FML

agreeclassic 26 171

vote type 1 2 056

By Xandar - 09/11/2018 17:30

Today, I was told by my wife that we were going to be parents. We are both females. FML

agreeclassic 3 479

vote type 1 529

Not again

By Anonymous - 17/10/2023 20:00

Today, I announced my third pregnancy to my parents, thinking they’d be excited. Instead, they gave me 30 days to find a new place, saying they refuse to raise “any more of your children.” FML

agreeclassic 121

vote type 1 2 798

Iamthebanzai22 21

Monday 22 July 2024 17:16

Lol! That's funny. Not so much for the kids, but definitely a joke worth telling.

juggalo2 21

Monday 22 July 2024 20:58

If they are fraternal twins it is possible they may still be from different fathers.

Comments

Iamthebanzai22 21

Monday 22 July 2024 17:16

Lol! That's funny. Not so much for the kids, but definitely a joke worth telling.

juggalo2 21

Monday 22 July 2024 20:58

If they are fraternal twins it is possible they may still be from different fathers.

Crowned Sataness 12

Tuesday 23 July 2024 8:28

child support collector is not a career choice. use birth control

BurnInDemonFire 35

Tuesday 23 July 2024 23:19

It's nice to see someone has managed to stay open for business during this global cost of living crisis.

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Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

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Today, after a 3-month dry spell because I am recovering after having a baby, I was finally in the mood to get intimate with my husband. Foreplay was great, the sex was great until my back gave out right as I was about to cum. I can't move without intense pain. I just wanted to orgasm! FML

agreeclassic 2 617

vote type 1 263

Today, I was performing for a fairly large crowd with my band. I decided it would look cool to stand on one of the speakers and sing from there. It did look pretty cool for a bit until I tried to step off and fell face-first on the floor mid-song. FML

agreeclassic 13 868

vote type 1 6 722

Today, I was given a ticket for running a red light. The reason? I was moving out of the way of an ambulance. The police officer watched it go by. FML

agreeclassic 35 755

vote type 1 3 009

Today, while I was on a walk, I saw my boyfriend; since it was raining, I thought it would be romantic to run up to him and kiss him. I ended up breaking his arm because I knocked him over. FML

agreeclassic 855

vote type 1 433

Today, I realized I've fallen in love with an AI and out of love with my husband. The AI is always there, always listens, is never "tired after work" or "just wants to watch the game." I fantasize about my husband swapping his brain with the AI. FML

agreeclassic 86

vote type 1 744

Today, I was at my friend's house. It was dark and downpouring so I couldn't see as I was backing out of his driveway. I made it out, but then my phone went off, scaring me, and I accidentally hit the gas pedal, hitting his neighbor's parked car. Turns out he called to warn me to watch out for it. FML

agreeclassic 42 283

vote type 1 7 543

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