Miscellaneous: Check these bad boys out - FML

Check these bad boys out

By Anonymous - 10/09/2009 06:57 - Australia

Today, my co-worker came back from Thailand with big new breasts. She told me to go ahead and touch them because they have a funny texture for the first few months. When our GM entered the room, I had both hands down my co-worker's shirt, agreeing that they were unnaturally firm. FML

agreeclassic 16 370

vote type 1 40 193

The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Similar FMLs

By FML - 05/07/2010 00:15 - United States

Today, I came to work ready to impress my boss. A couple of weeks ago I asked him for a promotion from stock to sales and I have been proving myself worthy. Turns out he hired a new girl for sales, with great, big, fake breasts. FML

agreeclassic 37 081

vote type 1 4 637

By milkshake - 23/01/2013 00:29 - United States - Pasadena

Today, at work at a car dealership, a seemingly overzealous customer shook my hand vigorously after we finalized a deal. I didn't think anything of it until a coworker pointed out that he was just trying to make my breasts jiggle. I'm a man. FML

agreeclassic 32 725

vote type 1 6 293

Big one

By Cnscott0205 - 17/11/2019 14:00 - United States - Denver

Today, I accidentally touched someone's boobs. It was a man. And I noticed that they were bigger than mine. FML

agreeclassic 1 831

vote type 1 274

What are you doing?

By Anonymous - this FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was on the phone with a client, when the gum I was casually chewing fell out of my mouth and down my shirt. While I was trying to dig it out, two of our newest customers walked into the lobby to see what looked like me fondling my breasts. FML

agreeclassic 25 634

vote type 1 12 961

Natural history

By latino - 11/11/2010 11:30 - United States

Today, at the museum I volunteer at, I was touching some of the things in the exhibit where you can feel what natural boobs and testes feel like. I started rolling the "boob" like a stress ball and forgot where I was. When I realized people were staring, it became very awkward. FML

agreeclassic 11 555

vote type 1 43 738

Ethics in medecine

By Savannah - 07/02/2017 10:00 - United States - Spring Hill

Today, I went to the doctor for a suspicious lump under my armpit, so he suggested a breast examination. While pressing all over them he said, "We're gonna have to send you for an X-ray because you have the most lumpy breasts I've ever felt in my life." FML

agreeclassic 7 877

vote type 1 602

By donuts678 - 16/08/2015 23:37 - United States - Passaic

Today, at the camp that I work at, a little girl asked to "feel" my muscles. Thinking it was cute, I flexed for her. She laughed and said, "No, really." FML

agreeclassic 20 331

vote type 1 8 220

Moobs

By Anonymous - 30/06/2009 22:19 - United States

Today, I met with a friend who had gained some weight since I saw him last. After a friendly hug, I put my hand on his new man boob and, without thinking, left it there way too long. I realized that I was groping him and, in a panic, did the only thing I could think of. I patted it. Twice. FML

agreeclassic 18 016

vote type 1 54 729

Look up here

By Cody - 06/07/2009 23:28 - United States

Today, during my shift at a restaurant, my boss's daughter came in. I couldn't help but notice that she was almost popping out of her low-cut top. After having a private chat with her, my boss took me aside and said, "My daughter's got eyes you know, not just a pair of tits". FML

agreeclassic 14 943

vote type 1 53 811

By Anonymous - 08/05/2013 06:42 - United States

Today, I got a breast exam. I'd never had one before, but assumed it would be quick and easy. I had no idea how ticklish my boobs are. I burst out in uncontrollable laughter and kept instinctively jerking away. FML

agreeclassic 45 057

vote type 1 5 550

Next

TOP COMMENTS

faildood 0

Thursday 10 September 2009 16:42

if your GM is a guy..expect a pay raise

XOfiestypixie 0

Thursday 10 September 2009 17:01

They're from Australia, silly. Why would they go to the US when Thailand is so much closer?

Comments

MrAdventure 1

Friday 11 September 2009 7:17

I guess you never heard of locking the door?

BoyMac 0

Friday 11 September 2009 10:10

HA HA HA! Great...

olisykes_ 0

Friday 11 September 2009 10:50

i'm gonna go have a wank now.

Cordeh 0

Friday 11 September 2009 17:28

I dont need the you deserved it or the that sucks buttons. i need a like button.

qwerty123456789 0

Friday 11 September 2009 23:25

Dude that's even funnier than the FML.

unruly1 1

Monday 14 September 2009 21:42

without pictures I can't believe it.

NormanRider14 0

Tuesday 15 September 2009 4:41

wow lucky were they soft? how big were they?

AntiChrist7 0

Saturday 19 September 2009 14:27

Sweet

JC193 0

Sunday 25 October 2009 11:06

Agreed, LMFAO @ 16

Bethanynel813 0

Saturday 16 January 2010 6:10

Your fault 100 percent.

2
3
4
5
6
7

VDM sur Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Love Coworkers Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Jealousy Underwear Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Top

Top

Today, I accidentally tackled my own teammate during a rugby match, so our coach made me walk the 5 miles back home instead of driving me home with the rest of the team. FML

agreeclassic 588

vote type 1 713

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. We are on a cruise together. She has already found another room to sleep in. FML

agreeclassic 53 830

vote type 1 3 569

Today, I found out why my 20 year-old girlfriend broke up with me. She was building everything she did to match her favorite TV show. The main character left her boyfriend in the exact way she left me. And the breakup email she sent me contained monologue from the TV show, word for word. FML

agreeclassic 72 466

vote type 1 5 054

Today, I finally got to spend a good amount of time with this girl I had been trying to get with for weeks, only to realize I wasn't that into her. I asked my friend for help and he proceeded to literally drag me away from her, while I pretended to try and stop him. FML

agreeclassic 162

vote type 1 1 211

Today, I was having my 9 year-old son help me find the TV remote. We were searching my bedroom when all the sudden my son says, “Look, mom it’s right here!” I turn around to see him pointing to where the remote was with my vibrator like a teacher pointing at a blackboard with a pointer. FML

agreeclassic 518

vote type 1 1 004

Today, what started with me forcing a shit a little too hard ended up with me being rushed to the hospital with appendicitis. FML

agreeclassic 31 546

vote type 1 2 904