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Hey FML, OP here! I created an account so I could answer some of your questions. First off, I live in Oregon. Secondly, I thought it was hilarious, although a tad creepy at times, but I just let her do her thing and didn't try to stop her. Most people thought it was great and took it really well. She had a blast doing it, and was simply pulling a prank, which is what Halloween is all about! :)

It's too dark in here

By Bob smith - 19/12/2011 20:57 - Australia

Today, it was my first day working as a nightclub bartender. All through the evening, a really creepy bloke stood in a dark corner and leered at the girls on the dance floor. When I took the bouncer to one side to let him know, he told me the man was a coat stand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 885

You deserved it 33 592

By yourstruly - 11/02/2010 19:40 - United States

Today, I woke up to the sound of someone having sex in the room next to me. I don't have a roommate. Turns out my mom thought I was out of town and used her extra key to bring a guy over for sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 761

You deserved it 2 370

By Anonymous - 26/07/2009 17:00 - France

Today, I went to a funeral for my coworker's father. While there, my dad's cell phone rang and he left to answer it. I turned to my brother and said, "I can't believe he brought his cell phone!" He whispered, "I can't believe he's got coverage. This is a dead zone!" I laughed loudly. At a funeral. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 762

You deserved it 58 975

By Pottymouth - 25/07/2009 17:14 - United States

Today, I was having really bad diarrhea. I sat down on the toilet and heard a plop, thinking it was just me going to the bathroom. After I was finished, I look in the toilet to see my iPhone sitting in a pool of diarrhea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 048

You deserved it 24 566

By jcooh0lla - 24/07/2009 21:30 - United States

Today, while my boyfriend and I were having sex, he suddenly stopped and walked to the kitchen. He decided to bake chocolate chip cookies in the midst of our intimacy. However, he told me we could still continue while the oven preheated. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 811

You deserved it 7 464

Good deeds

By dhdyvifjdksk - 26/01/2020 03:00 - United States

Today, I donated blood and the nurse said: "God blesses good deeds", when I get home, my mom tells me that we have to sell the house because we're broke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 241

You deserved it 150

By lonely - 08/09/2018 22:00

Today, my boyfriend blocked me from every form of contact. He told my friend that we broke up, but never told me. I still have his clothes in my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 188

You deserved it 209

By kareed3 - 19/07/2009 16:43 - United States

Today, I got a letter in the mail about my periodic health assessment for active duty Soldiers. I came back positive for two curable STD's that are extremely common on Fort Polk. I haven't had sex with anyone but my wife. FML

I agree, your life sucks 79 604

You deserved it 4 096

By winterbee123 - 25/10/2012 08:07 - United States - Portland

Today, I got back my history paper. The whole paper had been crossed out and at the end, my professor had written "Really?!" I still don't know what I did wrong. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 702

You deserved it 4 373

winterbee123 tells us more.

winterbee123 9

Thursday 25 October 2012 23:36

Hi all - I'm OP. I actually went to talk to my teacher and it turns out when he tells us to do "citations" he automatically assumes we know he actually means "footnotes". I accidentally started crying during our meeting and I think it freaked him out, so he's offering me a chance to rewrite it! Ah, the power of a girl's tears!

You snooze, you lose

By propose_you_freakin_coward - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - Singapore - Singapore

Today, I was insulted and harassed by my sister and her boyfriend, all because I proposed yesterday. They were angry I might get married before they did. They have known each other since primary school; I met my fiancée earlier this year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 942

You deserved it 6 863

By Anonymous - 22/10/2012 00:29 - United States - Bellingham

Today, while my mother's blind friend was waiting in our kitchen for my mom to come home, I thought it would be funny to talk to her in the nude. Turns out she's only blind in one eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 561

You deserved it 59 163

By Anonymous - 04/03/2016 16:47 - United States - Suwanee

Today, I had so much skin peeling off my lips that it got caught in my fork as I was eating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 264

You deserved it 5 510

By RR - 11/07/2009 05:58 - United States

Today, I went with my sister to get our eyebrows waxed. I didn't think my eyebrows were that bad--and they weren't! When the guy waxed my eyebrows, he gestured my lips and said, "Moustache, too?" Mortified, I said, "No!" to which he replied, "Aw, someone no get kissy tonight." FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 509

You deserved it 9 977

By thesixth - 02/03/2016 18:53 - Kenya

Today, being jobless and all, I tried calling my dad for a job after my many years of pride. He invited me to an interview to compete against 10 people, probably more qualified than I am. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 085

You deserved it 7 228

Wrong place, wrong time

By Anonymous - 23/08/2020 23:02

Today, my boyfriend are I are staying at his parents' while they are away. While having sex in their bed, the whole bed went crashing to the floor. We have no idea what to do, and we leave tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 671

You deserved it 2 399

By exuberant_orange - 08/01/2015 15:56 - United States - Fort Myers

Today, a girl from class screamed at me in public for hugging the guy she likes. She threatened to take me out if I didn't "back off". That guy is my boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 239

You deserved it 2 614

exuberant_orange tells us more.

exuberant_orange 17

Friday 9 January 2015 6:18

Hey OP here, it's awesome this got posted! Follow up for some people with questions: This girl came to my school while I was out on sick leave, so being she was in the same class as the BF and I; she got to know him before I came back. He told her he was taken but apparently since I wasn't actually there this didn't phase her. The boyfriend is rather creeped by this girl's psycho tendencies, and has tried to avoid her the entire time I was gone, when I came back we figured she would see us together and drop the crush. This backfired apparently. XD Anyhow my boyfriend and I found her and talked to her later and tried to calmly explain that we were together. She was quiet long enough for us to finish. She mostly seemed really embarrassed and actually apologized! Hopefully she'll stop sending me poisonous looks now. :p But all is (for the most part) well now. Thanks everyone!