Stop crying your heart out
By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States
By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States
By Tweenmom - 13/04/2017 16:00
By chucklesman96 - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - Canada - Westerose
By bish_wut - 10/09/2016 20:15 - United States - Huntington Beach
By one sorry mom - 05/09/2017 04:31
By Pikababy19 - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States - Mount Vernon
By Why - 02/04/2014 08:13 - Australia - Sydney
By nightfall8705 - 19/06/2015 18:26 - United States
OP here! There is so much more to this story than I'm not going into, but the jist of it is this: I was to replace this chick who was supposed to be moving to Texas with her "church" and I was perfect to fill in her absence. The dumbledouche hiring manager told me several times I was hired and that the girl was moving and all that. Then the excuses start for why I couldn't take my test. First, the computer was down. Second, the manager said he was managing 3 stores at once because another manager had a "heart attack", and the third time was because he "had an emergency" situation last week, and told me to come in yesterday. After the test, he broke the news to me that his thundercunt (my words, not his) employee decided she wasn't going to move to Texas after all, because her baby daddy were here and she needed money from him and that she found out the welfare was better in SC than Texas. I probably won't even get paid for my time, but that's not even what I'm pissed about. Turns out that "emergency" the hiring manager had was a vacation in Hawaii. He must have forgotten the lie he told me, because those words came directly from his cum balloon mouth. I've got an interview for a job on Monday for an even better restaurant anyway, so screw em'.
By Anonymous - 11/05/2016 15:53 - United States - Franklin
By IntrepidPig - 10/04/2016 04:32 - United States - Albany
Hi guys. I have some explaining to do. First off, she thought she had taken my computer as well. She was looking for it when she got home, trying to remember where she put it. Now, when she got home, I decided to put my pajamas on. As I went in my clothes drawer, I wondered if I would hide it there, then I decided I would hide it behind my bookshelf instead. This triggered a memory of me deciding not to hide it behind my bookshelf because it would be too perfect, thus too obvious. I then remembered where I hid it, walked over with such a feeling of idiocy, and found it. I completely deserved this
By LMN - 31/07/2009 01:30 - United States
By crazyclumzy - 04/02/2010 05:05 - Canada
By kisyfrot - 18/12/2008 03:38 - France
By Anonymous - 12/10/2012 01:51 - Canada - Toronto
By DemonicDummy - 05/01/2017 05:06
By ducky2721 - 02/01/2010 13:46 - United States
By disgruntled - 09/12/2015 15:01
By facepalm - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States
By Not a programmer yet - 01/09/2015 15:30 - United States - San Francisco
By S. Fancyson - 16/04/2013 23:23 - United States
By roomatewoes - 01/04/2013 00:45 - United States - Northfield
By sad_unicorn - 31/07/2016 04:51
By carl_carl_ - 25/07/2016 04:17 - United States - Grand Ledge
By Grosssss - 15/07/2016 16:08 - United States - Harrisonburg
By 06SuFi - 07/03/2009 00:43 - United States
They told me it was just Testicular Inflammation, I have to take some medicine to see if it gets better. The worst part was when she stuck the q-tip down the tip of my dick, its not a pleasant feeling.
By nose hurts - 30/12/2012 01:01 - United States - Richmond
By 3,500 down - 07/05/2016 08:00 - United States - Altus
By j - 01/03/2011 06:26
By AirOne - 12/11/2008 14:39 - United States
By Anonymous - 12/12/2014 14:45 - United States - Port Saint Lucie
Keywords
Hello, everyone! I'm the OP. I am so shocked/ excited this actually got posted! First off, thanks for all the kind comments, I smiled quite a few times haha. As for my friendless life, I am homeschooled due to many health problems I have, such as anxiety, so being home alone all day, it's quite hard to make friends. But I do realize I could do something about it instead of sitting here moaping. My birthday is in 2 days, so my sister is going to help me invite some neighbors and hopefully I can make some friends :) (#3 and #4, thanks friends :D) Thanks for the luck everyone, I think I'll definitely need it.