Love: Today, I told my girlfriend that I'm breaking up with her because...

By Anonymous - 03/12/2012 11:53 - Canada

Today, I told my girlfriend that I'm breaking up with her because she's very abusive. After a couple of seconds of awkward silence, she kicked me in the nuts and ran away. FML

agreeclassic 33 116

vote type 1 4 201

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By ddll - 05/09/2011 01:27 - Singapore

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She responded by sitting on the floor, crying like a baby and screaming "WHY?" at strangers. FML

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Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Because she farted, and thought it was "too awkward". FML

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By ouch - 29/03/2011 03:33 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I were playfully arguing about who loved the other more. After about a minute of this, my girlfriend walked over and kicked me in the crotch as hard as she could. She then said, "There, now you don't love me as much. I win." FML

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By ouch - 16/06/2016 10:14 - United States - Livonia

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She was so angry, she stabbed me in the hand with a plastic fork. FML

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By GirlishMan1883897 - 24/07/2010 10:53 - United States

Today, my girlfriend of 2 years broke up with me because she said I was more of a woman than she was. I yelled out, "I HATE YOU!" and started to cry. She then took a tampon out of her purse, handed it to me, laughed, and walked away. FML

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By never dip the wick in crazy - 15/04/2016 19:00 - Romania

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Sweet relief

By Anonymous - this FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She was ecstatic. Apparently, she'd been trying to figure out how to break up with me for the past four months. FML

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By WTF? - 12/08/2013 04:49 - United States - Mesa

Today, I asked my girlfriend if she had ever broken up with anyone. She said, "Yes. You." and walked off. FML

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By Anonymous - 27/09/2013 20:33 - United States - Spring Branch

Today, I broke up with my abusive girlfriend. She responded by breaking into my place and stabbing my hamster with a fork. FML

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allenalives 1

Monday 3 December 2012 19:01

You CAN press charges you know...even in Canada, I'm sure

lilhellian 26

Monday 3 December 2012 19:02

Atleast you didn't wake up with icyhot there after she kicked you.

Comments

daviddgaf 3

Monday 3 December 2012 22:25

Her Name Ashley?! Dont Ask How I Know.

EpicSquishii 21

Tuesday 4 December 2012 15:09

Oh. We weren't going to. Don't worry

sweetmama88 6

Monday 3 December 2012 22:37

Your better off without her.

Rocky007 15

Monday 3 December 2012 22:38

Hey, at least you know you are an accurate judge of character.

FireFlie07 20

Monday 3 December 2012 22:50

You did the right thing

dan_in_wi 12

Monday 3 December 2012 22:50

what, are you in ****** 3rd grade? Christ...

simoncat 11

Monday 3 December 2012 22:55

Well played. Just in time for Christmas, you starred in your own version of THE NUTCRACKER. Ditch the bitch. Hang your stocking elsewhere.

ericcrash 13

Monday 3 December 2012 23:09

oww my cucumber!!!

RedPillSucks 31

Monday 3 December 2012 23:10

Sing a chorus of "Rudolph the Red Nut Reindeer"

drkrissy1331 12

Monday 3 December 2012 23:17

Nice!

rocketiquette 20

Monday 3 December 2012 23:49

Is she 8..?

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

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agreeclassic 50 001

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Today, I got thrown out by a guy I really like, with the words, "Can you leave me the fuck alone, please?" I took my stuff and left as quickly as I could, just to fall down the stairs on his doorway, and twist my ankle really bad. He's someone from work as well. FML

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Today, I got to say, "My best friend hooked up with my step-sister's grandma's aunt" and be correct. FML

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The best part of breaking up…

Sweet relief

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