Health, Sex, Relatable and Intimacy: Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. After...

By JoshuasGirl - 23/12/2013 19:13 - United States - Grand Rapids

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. After he'd repeatedly told me not to worry about bleeding, and reassuring me that he'd take care of me, he passed out halfway through. FML

agreeclassic 54 126

vote type 1 6 462

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By Anonymous - 21/08/2014 21:24 - Portugal - Alg

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to lose our virginity. When he saw blood, he panicked and started crying, convinced that he was bleeding out. FML

agreeclassic 54 840

vote type 1 6 742

First time?

By Anonymous - 29/11/2013 11:56 - United States - Westminster

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. It was also the first time he'd ever had sex. How could I tell? He cried all the way through, and called his parents right after. FML

agreeclassic 63 321

vote type 1 6 908

Heartless swine

By Anonymous - 15/09/2015 05:56 - United States

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. Afterwards, I got up to get some water. When I stood up, I fell straight to the ground, my legs were so weak. As I fell, I hit my head on the end table and knocked myself unconscious. My boyfriend laughed at me. FML

agreeclassic 31 047

vote type 1 4 396

Follow the script

By ufhdafuhds - 19/03/2009 23:31 - Egypt

Today, I had sex for the first time with my boyfriend. It was his first time too. While in bed, he blankly stopped and stood up and got out a piece of paper from his pocket. Turns out he'd written instructions on what to do while in bed, and forgot what he had to do next. FML

agreeclassic 139 451

vote type 1 14 513

Absolute beginners

By Anonymous - 13/07/2014 20:00 - Spain - Ripollet

Today, my boyfriend and I were about to make love for the first time. The moment my bra came off, he started hyperventilating to the point of blacking out. So much for that. FML

agreeclassic 55 954

vote type 1 5 974

By anon - 08/12/2012 05:33 - United States

Today, when my boyfriend and I were getting intimate, I got a nose bleed. He gave me a shirt to plug it with and kept going. FML

agreeclassic 32 497

vote type 1 5 455

It's just a flesh wound!

By manhandled - 01/02/2012 18:05 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. He picked me up and threw me over his shoulder to take me to his room. He wasn't careful enough, and dropped me right on my head, on the hardwood floor. I ended up vomiting and came down with a headache. He still wanted to have sex. FML

agreeclassic 39 244

vote type 1 4 039

By disapointed girl - 28/12/2009 16:58 - United States

Today, my boyfriend of a month and I had sex for the first time. We started in the shower and then moved to his bedroom. He then feel asleep when I was on top. FML

agreeclassic 22 050

vote type 1 5 907

By Confused - 22/08/2012 16:33 - Spain - Madrid

Today, I finally had sex with my boyfriend. I had never gotten so far with a guy, so I was really nervous. He was careful, we tried different positions, "it was fun" and he came. I barely felt anything. FML

agreeclassic 33 830

vote type 1 4 434

By firsttimer69 - 20/03/2009 06:11 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to have sex. I was a virgin and he wasn't. About 30 seconds in he collapsed on me. I thought he was joking around and I started laughing. He wasn't joking. He was done. FML

agreeclassic 151 777

vote type 1 15 201

Krystal3408 32

Monday 23 December 2013 23:46

Well at least you know he cared.

DanBerryKrinkle 4

Monday 23 December 2013 23:49

oh joshua...

Comments

1R1X0X0 10

Wednesday 25 December 2013 0:35

How and why?

hystericsky 11

Wednesday 25 December 2013 7:38

Isn't anyone else worried by the key word "halfway"?

BWARD51 12

Wednesday 25 December 2013 7:44

legit!

rockhead1270 5

Wednesday 25 December 2013 16:11

Poor dude, all his blood went to his peeder

SillyWilly69 1

Wednesday 25 December 2013 18:14

Tiiiiiny.... Lol

CUPCAKESLOVER24 5

Saturday 28 December 2013 14:17

That's hilarious xD

letsgetawkward 6

Sunday 29 December 2013 7:31

when that happened to me my boyfriend said he felt like he murdered someone and was completely turned off :/

Kelsey_Zitzner 2

Tuesday 31 December 2013 6:40

Hahaha... Wow... That sucks

mandy_oneal 3

Friday 3 January 2014 10:14

She is young, she's only 15

ndnpride88 25

Tuesday 7 January 2014 15:05

At only 15 maybe you should've waited a couple more years. And if y'all were truly ready he would've manned up and been prepared

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Today, my wife and I were out with another couple we're friends with. When we went back to their house we looked at old pictures. They showed us a great picture, and I said "It would've been a lot better if that fat chick didn't ruin it in the background." It was the woman from the couple. FML

agreeclassic 9 676

vote type 1 64 684

Today, I proudly told my family I lost 15 pounds. My dad looked me up and down and said, "Well, you've got a looooong way to go." FML

agreeclassic 21 257

vote type 1 1 977

Today, it's my 18th birthday. I called my parents and they told me that they found weed in the guest house, so they called my boarding school to drug test me. It wasn't my weed. They didn't even say, "Happy Birthday." FML

agreeclassic 70 634

vote type 1 4 904

Today, in my early morning haze, I tried to find the setting on my phone that would stop my cat meowing for his breakfast. FML

agreeclassic 6 264

vote type 1 1 383

Today, my girlfriend and I were in my basement. I play drums and guitar very well. My girlfriend bet me $50 that she could play better than me. I made the bet, but what I didn't know was that she had been taking both drum and guitar lessons since she was 5. I just lost $50. FML

agreeclassic 9 586

vote type 1 46 282

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend humping my stuffed rabbit. I thought he was trying to be funny until I saw that he had an erection. FML

agreeclassic 66 367

vote type 1 5 012