Intimacy: Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't... - FML

By RC3Welly - 09/03/2012 22:58 - United States

Spicy

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

agreeclassic 800

vote type 1 1 942

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It's a trap!

By RC3Welly - 09/03/2009 22:58 - United States

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Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

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By fuckmuppeter512 - 04/01/2014 22:26 - United Kingdom

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By ottawaaa - 27/01/2009 22:26 - Canada

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Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend and as I pulled out to finish I slipped and ended up punching her in the stomach, I came while she was writhing in pain. FML

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Not funny

By Blue balled by porn - 02/12/2025 20:00

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I don't understand!

By Anonymous - 28/11/2019 18:00 - Canada

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Precaution

By Tai - 31/10/2010 13:30 - Australia

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Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when I came. She got pissed and slapped me really hard for coming inside her because she didn't want to get pregnant. 1. I was wearing a condom. 2. She's on the pill. 3. We were having anal sex. FML

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By sexisntfun - 30/03/2015 02:13 - United States

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Today, I was about to lose my virginity to my girlfriend, with whom I am genuinely in love. Right after I'd got the condom on, she said, "You do know this is break-up sex, right?" FML

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By Marco - 01/04/2013 21:00 - United States

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Today, I brought a girl home from a bar. Things were getting hot and heavy when she asked if I had a condom. I opened my wallet to grab the one I keep in there, only to find the empty wrapper in its place; it was the only one I had. It seems drunk me is a bigger jerk than I thought. FML

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By air - 13/07/2009 09:17 - United States

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Today, I found out I was pregnant. When I told my boyfriend that I couldn't believe this happened he said, "I'm not going to lie, I didn't always pull out fast." FML

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Wrap it up

By Anonymous - 03/09/2023 14:00

Spicy

Today, the one time, THE ONE TIME, we ran out of condoms and had sex anyway, my girlfriend got pregnant, even though she’s on the pill. I didn’t even orgasm inside her, I had to do a Google search to learn that live sperm can emerge and go inside her even before I orgasm. We are so screwed. FML

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Next

TOP COMMENTS

citylights 0

Tuesday 10 March 2009 9:07

hahahahahaha that is ******

Anony_fml 0

Tuesday 10 March 2009 9:07

Pull out method doesn't work. You're ****** for life.

Comments

Cporter1722 5

Wednesday 4 May 2011 5:22

hmm dude that sucks...well next time u won't have drunken sex with a girl u barely know lol

greenjedi 0

Wednesday 4 May 2011 7:31

hahaa hopefully ur lucky

columbiancoffeei 6

Thursday 5 May 2011 2:23

LMFAO xD you so deserve that one you should know better than that bro

hwp123 0

Thursday 5 May 2011 4:08

so how's the baby

kfchiken 0

Thursday 5 May 2011 7:06

well that's sucks for you but mostly the kid if you have one... but there's always abortion ?

danidollface 0

Thursday 5 May 2011 19:32

think I would have been more worried about things like HIV, aids, hpv, and the list goes on. ydi for being an idiot.

NecromancerA7X 0

Friday 6 May 2011 3:42

teach you to take advantage of a drunk girl. respect women man. I'm 16 and know that.

NStarB 13

Friday 6 May 2011 17:57

FYL !

nattia 0

Sunday 8 May 2011 3:54

that's shitty, but now your gonna have a beautiful baby!

Denizobali 2

Monday 9 May 2011 5:09

oh my god

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Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

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