Transportation: Someone thinks highly of themself - FML

Someone thinks highly of themself

By ballerphilip23 - 15/05/2009 17:11 - Austria

Today, I was standing on the packed bus home when I had a speck of dust in my lenses. As I couldn't rub it out, I tried blinking it out for the next five minutes. Then the hot girl opposite me screamed, "Stop winking at me, don't even think about it you ugly fuck!" FML

agreeclassic 39 986

vote type 1 2 982

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By mhm - 06/05/2012 02:21 - Canada - Woodbridge

Today, on the bus, I caught the eye of this ugly, sweaty girl giving me a death stare through the driver's mirror. I gave her a death stare back. Only then I realized I was staring at myself. FML

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WTF? FML!

By ricky the sage - 05/10/2013 00:04 - United Kingdom - Coventry

Today, I was on the bus, heading to work, when the girl beside me started yelling at me, claiming I was staring down her shirt. I did no such thing, but the driver nonetheless stopped the bus and made me get off, all under the withering glares of the other passengers. FML

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By apparentlyawomanbeater - 20/04/2012 21:48 - Switzerland - Cadempino

Today, I was on the bus during rush hour. A fly started buzzing around my head, and I swatted at it, at the exact moment the woman beside me decided to get out of her seat and put her face straight in the path of my hand. FML

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By mitchellcrawford - 31/05/2016 18:05 - United States - San Francisco

Today, after seeing a cute girl on the bus, I tried to look cool by flipping my hair, only to smack the side of my head into the bus window. FML

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Gross

By clips - 16/02/2011 21:08 - United States

Today, I was on the bus. I heard a click right before something small hit my cheek. I looked over to see the lady next to me cutting her long, dirty fingernails. The bus was too crowded to move and It was a 20 minute ride to work. FML

agreeclassic 29 968

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By Anonymous - 10/02/2011 23:32 - United States

Today, I was on the bus heading home from school, when I noticed a ridiculously hot girl near me, checking me out. I was about to say something charmingly funny when I suddenly got a whiff of onions. Turns out she had turned around simply to catch the essence of her own fart. FML

agreeclassic 37 154

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Suggestion

By living in the ugly treehouse - 14/02/2016 11:23 - Australia

Today, while taking the bus home, a girl stared at me for a while before asking me if I'd ever heard of makeup. FML

agreeclassic 21 556

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By Anonymous - 26/11/2009 05:15 - Canada

Today, I was riding on my usual bus, when I noticed a man staring at me. I was having a really bad day, and said "Can you please stop staring at me?" He then replied with "I'm just trying to look out the window, and your head is in the way. Don't flatter yourself." FML

agreeclassic 10 350

vote type 1 46 567

By neoteck - 08/01/2009 07:55 - France

Today, I was talking to a charming young lady on MSN by webcam. She suddenly asked me to take my glasses off for a minute; I did so, and she said, "Oh never mind, you're still just as ugly..." FML

agreeclassic 26 139

vote type 1 2 611

By wench - 23/12/2010 20:39 - United States

Today, while driving, I idly started picking my nose. I looked over at the car next to me and saw a smoking hot guy from my school staring at me in disgust. He kept staring until I took a turn-off. FML

agreeclassic 9 565

vote type 1 36 652

Next

TOP COMMENTS

fedora_fan13 0

Saturday 16 May 2009 1:39

someone's a self-centered, hard-to-believe-she-can-still-walk, skanky bitch...sorry something similar happened to me

genius_man16 0

Saturday 16 May 2009 1:58

Shoulda slapped a ho.

Comments

bunnybean12321 18

Monday 23 March 2015 10:58

"dont flatter yourself princess, my eye is bothered, probably by your shitty attitude"

fantasyworld 37

Tuesday 28 April 2015 15:30

Tell her "Don't flatter yourself hun".

PopBlox 14

Tuesday 24 November 2015 1:49

Should've pretended it was a disorder and made her feel bad

visej1122 9

Friday 8 July 2016 12:18

so what happened next. .I hope she gets karma for being a stuck up

chessdude 8

Monday 29 August 2016 23:13

Bitches be crazy

stfuwtf 21

Tuesday 4 October 2016 16:04

She's a bit full of herself.

KJ6 21

Sunday 9 October 2016 0:58

"Don't flatter yourself you stupid twat! I have something in my eye, and not every f'ing thing is about you!" And scene.

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agreeclassic 35 149

vote type 1 2 799

Today, I forgot my inhaler. I had an asthma attack and had to go to the ER. The doctors told me it wasn't an asthma attack. It was just a panic attack from worrying about whether I would get an asthma attack. FML

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Today, I went to the orthodontist to have my braces worked on. I accidentally swallowed some of the cleaning solution she used. She told me it would probably give me an upset stomach. Apparently, an upset stomach and crapping your pants means the same thing to an orthodontist. FML

agreeclassic 39 787

vote type 1 4 305

Today, I was making a nacho and grabbed some refried beans that were in a plastic container out of the fridge and put them on top of the chips. After I’m completely done eating my mom looks in the fridge and asked me if I knew where the cat food was. I just ate a small can of cat food. FML

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Today, to impress my date with dinner, I spent hours prepping and cooking. Just as I was about to serve her, I realized I'd left the stove on and my kitchen was on fire. As the fire trucks arrived and my date looked on in horror, I couldn't help but think, "My cooking is so hot it literally set the house on fire." FML

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Today, I went through the car wash my boyfriend works at. When I pulled in, I explained I was Greg's girlfriend and cutely asked if I could get a free car wash. His co-worker looked at me confused and said, "Greg said he didn't have a girlfriend", then he looked at me and said, "Now I know why." FML

agreeclassic 51 145

vote type 1 12 497