Animals, Sex and Weird: Gastropod scandal

Gastropod scandal

By Anonymous - 20/05/2022 04:00

Today, one of my aquatic snails banged my other aquatic snail til they both died. FML

agreeclassic 1 057

vote type 1 170

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By stpdaziandude - 08/05/2009 20:51 - United States

Today, I was watching an animal behavior movie. All of a sudden, it brings up two snails going at it. I got hard watching it. FML

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By deadhamster - 03/02/2012 18:29 - United States

Today, I woke up to one of my hamsters cannibalizing the other. FML

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By fledermausi - 12/06/2012 13:02 - Hungary - Budapest

Today, I came home to my boyfriend emptying his bowels into my aquarium. FML

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By PoachedFish - 29/12/2009 10:57 - Lebanon

Today, was very chilly. My little sister felt sorry for my two goldfish swimming in the cold water. She decided to put them in hot water. They died. FML

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By roze198765 - 04/08/2011 01:19 - United States

Today, my cat died in the process of eating, and choking on, my hamster. FML

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Murdered

By Anonymous - 16/02/2021 20:01

Today, I woke up and checked my fish tank. I thought the temperature was too low, so half asleep, I turned it up. Now all my fish are dead. FML

agreeclassic 409

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By gimmeasalad - 21/04/2012 06:01 - United States - Walnut Creek

Today, as I was washing my boyfriend's fishbowl, the fish did a Nemo and made an unholy leap down the drain. My immediate impulse was to flip the switch. Our kitchen now smells like mutilated fish and my boyfriend won't speak to me. FML

agreeclassic 10 157

vote type 1 36 945

By Sassers - 03/12/2009 21:08 - United States

Today, I heard a loud crashing noise. I ran into the kitchen to see what it was. My cat had knocked over my fish bowl and had my Beta in her mouth. After scolding her and rescuing it, I decided to clean its bowl. When I went to dump some of the water in the sink, my fish went down the drain. FML

agreeclassic 11 859

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By SydIsPrettyCool - 04/08/2011 05:44 - United States

Today, my pet fish died because my drunk father microwaved it. FML

agreeclassic 50 166

vote type 1 3 399

By Brinty - 24/10/2009 04:26 - Australia

Today, I found my brand new tropical fish dead in its tank because my boyfriend got drunk last night and decided to pour red wine into the aquarium. FML

agreeclassic 36 493

vote type 1 3 569

cuz803 44

Friday 20 May 2022 4:15

Now that's ******* the life out of each other!!! ....okay I'll go now

RichardPencil 30

Friday 20 May 2022 5:38

I guess he really... ...wait on it... ..."snailed" her!

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cuz803 44

Friday 20 May 2022 4:15

Now that's ******* the life out of each other!!! ....okay I'll go now

RichardPencil 30

Friday 20 May 2022 5:38

I guess he really... ...wait on it... ..."snailed" her!

SirEnigM0nk 22

Friday 20 May 2022 5:54

This must have happened at a snail's pace...

macone 30

Friday 20 May 2022 9:21

I think that's what they call 'death by snu snu'.

tarababy24 5

Friday 20 May 2022 23:23

Dammit you got to it first lmao

sixxis 7

Monday 23 May 2022 10:38

What’s worse, that you made this a topic or that you actually watched them bang until the end?

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Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

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Today, I was dating someone who completely believed cyborgs killed his family, although they are very much alive. He also faked having relationships a couple of times, and last but not least he pretended to be someone else he was stalking in real life for 3 years. I only found this out after I broke up with him. FML

agreeclassic 853

vote type 1 140

Today, I had sex with a guy. As he was sleeping next to me, I checked his Facebook messages and saw that he sent a message to one of his buddies, asking what kind of lotion helps get rid of crabs. FML

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Today, I went camping. The night was calm and quiet, so we went to our separate tents to sleep. I closed my eyes, listening to the distant waves and my father playing porn in the tent beside me. FML

agreeclassic 7 191

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Today, I finally told my father that I was picked on at college all this year over my hearing disability. When I told him one of the jokes they made about me, he burst out into an uncontrollable fit of laughter. FML

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vote type 1 3 594

Today, I came home to yet another kitten. My girlfriend swore to me this would never happen again. When I reminded her of her promise, she told me the kitten will be staying, and she wants me to move out. FML

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Today, my dad was teaching me how to drive. He told me that stop signs with white outlines are "optional." I ran through the next one I saw and got pulled over by a cop. My dad is making me pay the ticket for being "that stupid." Thanks dad. FML

agreeclassic 14 134

vote type 1 42 008

Gastropod scandal

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