By Anonymous - 22/11/2013 20:51 - United States - Lake Stevens
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Frogletts's favorite FMLs
Reflex
By OuchImAMoron - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Old Bridge
By fleetingmemories - 29/11/2013 23:55 - United States - Falls Church
Why would I do that to me?
By car keyer - 02/12/2013 06:41 - United States - Mary Esther
By eastsiderounder - 02/12/2013 17:11 - United States - South Jordan
eastsiderounder tells us more.
KEEP OUT
By Awkward - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Redmond
By eer004 - 07/12/2013 10:06 - United States - Odessa
eer004 tells us more.
I am really surprised this made it through. on the bright side we had been discussing getting a cat for our daughter. I just expected to let her pick it out, not to wake up to a knew kitten in my bed
By mariology - 11/12/2013 12:33 - United States - Newark
By Lemurcat - 11/12/2013 16:56 - United States - Ventura
Lemurcat tells us more.
I did not expect this to get published! Just to fill you guys in a bit, I did check the buses before leaving home since I just moved here the day before. I like to double check because my memory is poor so I did ask the bus driver, but she said she didn't go to that perticular bus stop (the bus stop near my house for those who are wondering, and yes, she did stop there, she was just confused because I didn't know the streets and was describing landmarks) and she kinda just blew me off. So I was standing around, confused like an idiot and this guy told me to take bus 6. He sounded like he was legitamently trying to help, and I'm not the sharpest tool in the shed, so stupid me took his advice. However, I'm not the kind of person to confront people so, I just called him a dickhole and walked away. I wish I could tell you guys that I kicked his ass, but oh well. I did figure out the buses and I'm riding like a pro now. And I even got a booklet to help me if I'm ever lost again. :D
New fragrance just dropped
By lavenderpiss - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - Australia - North Adelaide
Bodyguards
By Anon - 18/12/2013 09:56 - United States - Paso Robles
By opinionsarestill - 20/12/2013 08:23 - United States - Sacramento
opinionsarestill tells us more.
HI! I appreciate sympathy. I wasn't expecting it, but it makes me feel a bit better. Thank you. XD It is (was) a college level English course (the last one I had to take for my GE requirements). I really did try hard in that class. I would ask him very specific questions and he would provide vague answers. His opinion on the material was never explicitly clear (considering every assignment we did was based upon a different work or subject). I'm not displeased about getting a B, it's just frustrating to be left so close to the next grade!
Dad prank #9866
By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - Sweden
Pixels
By back to creepers - 21/12/2013 20:05 - United Kingdom - Worcester
Spooky season is nearly here
By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States
MY EYES
By bleach bleach bleach - 22/12/2013 17:22 - United States - Las Vegas
By Eri_Midori - 25/12/2013 02:57 - United States - San Francisco
Eri_Midori tells us more.
Hi guys, Op here! Wasn't expecting this to get posted so that's a pretty nice side to my situation :D I enjoyed reading you guy's comments, and to some of you trying to defend the dog (Peanut) you have nothing to fear. I have been put in a position where I had to take care of Peanut every now and then, but only for a day or two while my mother was feeling un-responsible. So I know for sure that Peanut really is a handful. I mean, she needs attention 24/7, has to have her diaper changed (which is really gross!) at least 5 times a day, bites most people who try to touch her, smells pretty bad no matter how many baths I give her, and enjoys spreading her scent all over my apartment! I understand that Peanut is nearing her end in the next year or two, plus I feel bad that she hasn't had a stable home all her life which explains her bad behavior. I've also been a vegetarian since I was 6, and was the president of my high school's Animal Rights Club back in the day, so I don't plan on getting rid of Peanut or ending her life early. The reason why my mother "gave me" peanut is because she is going through her mid life crisis and wants to travel the world without any obligations, like an elderly dog she adopted a year ago. My mother has always been flaky and unable to keep her word, and I'd normally understand since she really has nothing to lose. She isn't married (divorced my father when I was in 1st grade), hates her job, plus both me and my brother have already moved out and graduated from college. I know she didn't dump Peanut on my brother since he couldn't care less about the life of an animal, I just wished she could have tried to find someone else (or not have used Peanut as a lousy excuse of a Christmas gift since she knows I've conversed to Agnosticism) judging my current conditions. At this moment I recently got married to my Japanese hubby originally from Osaka Japan. I work as a language teacher which is quite flexible location wise, plus me and my husband are both still in our early 20's, so we were hoping to travel a lot and even move to Japan as soon as possible. However it's very hard to get a large pet like Peanut from America to Japan so that may be impossible. Not to mention my husband is slightly allergic to animals that shed! To top it all off we also have a non-shedding, dog hating cat in our apartment building that just so happens to NOT ALLOW DOGS. With all this in mind I don't really understand why my mother chose me as her new doggie's mama. I talked to my husband who knows how "nutty" my mother can be and he was completely understanding. He apparently spoke with our landlord this afternoon who is also a very nice man and agreed we can keep Peanut for now, as long as she doesn't bark or disturb our neighbors. We also looked up that if we keep giving Peanut plenty of baths then her fur shouldn't bother my husband too much, after all she needs it too. Yuck! As for our cat, she's still young. So she just needs to learn to play nice with Peanut for a little while. Then maybe we'll get another cat after Peanut passes on to even things out a bit. For now we've got things all settled, it's just a little upsetting since I've been working so hard these past couple of years learning Japanese so that I could eventually move there with my husband, and now that we're finally ready to go it's not too great having an obstacle keeping us from going for now. We'll go as soon as we can though =) Sorry for this super long comment, and thanks for all of your advice! Happy holidays! -Eri
Ah, those were the times…
By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Ely
By Anonymous - 30/04/2014 05:17 - United States - Muncy
By I suck :( - 07/05/2014 21:25 - United States - Louisville
OP here. Yeah, this ended the relationship on the spot. Especially with how I reacted to it. I believe my exact words were, "no! That's *expletive* gross!" She rebutted with, "it wouldn't be so bad, we've seen each other naked several times before." Referring to her uncle. That did it for me. It's not as bad as pedophilia, they're only a few months apart, he's older, but both over 18. Still I can proudly say she is my ex-girlfriend now and can do whatever the hell she wants with her uncle. This was literally the first red-flag I'd had in the three months since we've been dating. I was all for filming a video, and didn't think it even needed to be said that we'd be using a tripod, or perhaps setting the camera on a shelf, apparently, she had other ideas. It's too bad too, she was actually a decent girlfriend. Ah well, I'll cut my losses and move on.