Akon_27

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About Akon_27

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Akon_27 - Followers

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Akon_27's FML badges

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

50 favorites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already added 50 FMLs to your favourites list!

The thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

The return of the thumb

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 Hugs on your profile. Kinky.

The list of badges to find

Akon_27's favorite FMLs

By MissSmarts - 14/12/2009 01:27 - United States

Today, I went to the grocery store where this really cute guy works. I swiped my card but the machine wouldn't read it. I swiped it quickly some more before getting frustrated and saying, "Your stupid machine doesn't work!" He took the card and turned it around. His face said it all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 981

You deserved it 39 709

By sillygoose - 14/12/2009 03:53 - Canada

Today, I went to the doctor to check the dark growth I just discovered on my back. It was chocolate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 322

You deserved it 192

By creeper - 14/12/2009 05:03 - United States

Today, I was talking to this guy I like. He's very private and hides all his photos and wall posts on Facebook. Or so I thought, turns out he has me on a restricted friends list, titled "Creepers." FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 296

You deserved it 26 914

By Anonymous - 14/12/2009 05:15 - Canada

Today, after taking my clothes out of the washer, I noticed at the very bottom of the washer my boyfriend's USB stick I found a couple of days ago. The USB stick contains his English essay, and his novel he has been working on for almost six months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 262

You deserved it 32 363

By Cathy - 14/12/2009 05:03 - United States

Today, my husband was choosing an auto insurance. Geico was $500 and Allstate was $200. He chose Geico because it had a 'cute little lizard.' FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 832

You deserved it 4 923

By Anonymous - 14/12/2009 06:58 - United States

Today, I was at the theatre with my 4-year-old son who was situated on my lap. Halfway through the movie, he turns to face me and states loudly, "Mommy, your legs are so furry!". Everyone watching the show turned and stared at us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 810

You deserved it 8 989

By WIIslave - 14/12/2009 07:49 - United States

Today, I went to the doctor to get a pulled arm muscle checked. I told him I had been bowling, and it had just started to hurt badly. He said it was normal for a man of my age (35) to pull a muscle when lifting a ball of 12-15 pounds. I then told him it was on my son's Wii. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 940

You deserved it 29 041

Work sucks, I know

By BadKitty42 - 14/12/2009 08:12 - United States

Today, it was my last day at work. I was offered a better job and accepted. Not wanting to leave my present boss hanging, I asked for time to give notice. While I trained my replacement, the owner at the new job had time to think about how slow the season is, and he decided not to fill the position. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 709

You deserved it 3 857

By luckygirl - 14/12/2009 09:05 - United States

Today, I was hit on by a guy who decided to use the line, "My love for you is like diarrhea, I just can't hold it in." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 001

You deserved it 4 531

By dahlia87 - 14/12/2009 17:20 - United States

Today, I got an email from the Law School Admissions Council saying that they received my request for my LSAT cancellation and they are confirming that it has been cancelled. The email also said the score will not be reinstated for any reason. I never requested for my score to be cancelled. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 008

You deserved it 2 191

By Anonymous - 14/12/2009 18:08 - United States

Today, I checked into my flight early. The kiosk asked me if I wanted an earlier flight for $50. Awesome. I swiped my card then continued to the next screen where I was informed my new flight was delayed to the same time as my original flight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 051

You deserved it 6 015

By fatman - 14/12/2009 18:49 - United States

Today, I was on a plane. The person sitting next to me was using the plane's wifi, and was on Facebook. They joined the group 'I hate sitting next to fat people on airplanes'. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 750

You deserved it 11 837

By Anonymous - 14/12/2009 19:36 - United States

Today, I was taking the final exam for one of my classes. The teacher came over to my desk, grabbed my test and ripped it in half. Then he grabbed my hand and read the note I had written on it to remind myself to pay rent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 662

You deserved it 6 743

Stay classy

By militarywife2b - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - France

Today, at work, I watched a man throw up in his hands, dump the contents on his plate, then eat the things it "didn't touch." I had to wash his plate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 181

You deserved it 2 239

The reports of my death are greatly exaggerated

By Ghost - 14/12/2009 21:21 - United States

Today, I was at my 10-year high school reunion. I saw the girl I used to have a BIG crush on, so I decided to go over and say hi. She screamed when she saw me. Then she started hitting me, looking panicked. I calmed her down and asked why she hit me. She says, "Everyone thought you were dead"' FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 878

You deserved it 2 817

By toiletgirl - 14/12/2009 23:26 - United States

Today, I was on AIM talking to a really cute guy, whom I've had a crush on for forever, when he asked me to video chat. I got so excited and immediately pressed accept, without thinking. Not until he started screaming and cursing did I realize that I was still using my laptop on the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 951

You deserved it 63 885

Bigmouth

By Sardine - 18/12/2009 22:14 - United States

Today, I went to a park and sat down next to this older lady. Some kids started fighting and screaming at each other, so I leaned next to her and said, "Man, am I glad those aren't MY kids." She turned to me and said, "Yeah, they're mine." FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 474

You deserved it 33 080

By Anonymous - 18/12/2009 23:10 - United States

Today, I was at the airport about to leave for my business trip. In the restroom, I put my purse on the edge of the sink and got my lipstick out. I leaned closer to apply my lipstick and my open purse fell into the sink, triggering the automatic faucet, filling my purse with water. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 788

You deserved it 10 039

By Poem - 19/12/2009 04:29 - United States

Today, I spent hours delicately writing out what seemed to be a beautiful poem to my girlfriend. After I sent it to her, I kept eyeing my phone to see her surprised message. No, the only response I got was, "You may want to use a spellcheck." FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 056

You deserved it 26 307

By GlassPwn - 19/12/2009 05:01 - United States

Today, I walked into my room in only a towel. I walked in front of my brother to get to my computer. He said, "My webcam is on." I replied smartly by screaming, hugging the towel tightly to me, turning, and running straight into the glass door, dropping the towel. His friends saw and laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 725

You deserved it 15 601