By Anonymous - 25/10/2015 02:33 - United States - North Little Rock
xxcmb3k3xx
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Beginner
You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Work is a 4-letter word
Voting on an FML in the "Work" category on a Monday morning between 8 and 9 a.m. How ironic.
Checking you out
You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.
Happy ending
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
Night owl
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 a.m.
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done, wrong turn. Go back.
Santa Claus
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
Inception
You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return, you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.
I like your style
You gave a Hug to someone. How cute!
The Mixer
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
Supersize Menu
You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Perfectionist
Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.
Profile completed
You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
It's in the can!
Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
Censored
Not one, not two, but 50 pages of the Intimacy category read. No comment.
Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
I agree, my mouse works.
200 "I agree" votes is a good start.
Judgmental
You have voted "You deserved it" over 100 times.
The thumb strikes back
You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
What'ch'all looking at?
You have put three pictures on your profile, but not necessarily pictures of your profile.
100 kick-ass comments
100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
One more and it's business time
You've received 68 Hugs on your profile. Kinky.
A new thumb
You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
50 quality comments
Clicking to reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried afterwards is even worthier.
42
See, son, moderating FMLs is like a marathon.
YDI Master
You made your 500th "You deserved it" vote.
Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja
You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
50 favorites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already added 50 FMLs to your favourites list!
The return of the thumb
You have thumbed 5000 comments.
Omelette Master Badge
You found all the eggs that were laid around FML. Happy incubating!
Xxcmb3k3xx's favorite FMLs
Caught
By Anonymous - 25/10/2015 02:47 - United States - Apollo
By MG73 - 02/11/2015 04:16 - United States - Scarborough
MG73 tells us more.
By cassieleigh1 - 05/11/2015 05:05 - United States - Davenport
cassieleigh1 tells us more.
I'm laughing really hard at the comments! Yeah, my dads pretty awesome. He understands keyboards and computer basics but he seriously types with just his index finger, using both hands, just pick-poking around while squinting back and forth from screen to keyboard to see. Lol He's not a weird-pervert, but a 50 year old punk who wishes he were my age (18), and living in the 70s again. He actually snuck into the Mississippi Valley Fair in Iowa this recent year and didn't get caught hahaha. When I was a kid he used to "copy" entry stamps with pen to get us in free. 9th birthday he took me to a local heavy metal concert, not sure why they allowed 9 year olds in a mosh pit... Also saw Rush for my 11th or something.
By blackonblight - 11/11/2015 11:23 - United States - Dover
blackonblight tells us more.
Hey guys. Sadly, the only things that stayed with me were a snippet of dialogue, entirely out of context. Like most dreams, it was more the idea of writing that was played out for me, the movie scene version. I felt the pride, the mental exertion, but chances are the dream didn't have any real writing in it. Just that word count at the top and the line "Those eyes looked in on me and all I was. They saw me, and they saw nothing. So now, they will see nothing. Forever." And the resulting crash from discovering it was all a dream is actually worse than the block itself. I'm not giving up, not by a long shot, but I doubt I'll be getting that story back, if it ever existed. But hey, I got an FML out of it!
By FalloutScrolls - 13/11/2015 14:49 - United States - Eau Claire
FalloutScrolls tells us more.
Hey guys, OP here. So the actual FML character limit doesn't allow for part 2 of this story. My wife actually did mention Fallout in the post, but because it was rather lengthy and the punchline was towards the end, people knee-jerk overreacted to what they saw, and didn't notice that the long post was abbreviated on Facebook with a "read more" link. Several messages later, all is cleared up, and we're laughing about it now.
By helpme - 24/11/2015 06:34 - United States - Annapolis
By GetAnotherRoomAlready - 12/03/2016 05:58 - United States - Singapore
By NordicNathan - 14/03/2016 04:49 - Canada - Burlington
NordicNathan tells us more.
Hey, I'm the author of the FML. So to clarify I just turned 16, she just turned 17 and is in the 12th grade. I've had my doubts about our relationship for a while because of how incompatible we are as people, but her talking about what she wants to name our kids and how cute they will be was kind of the last straw for me. She said "I love you" after our second time seeing each other and after she had already cheated on me, so I definitely hear all the comments about telling her my concerns and/or breaking up with her. But she cries at the drop of a hat and is what I would consider emotionally unstable, this is also the reason I didn't break up with her after she cheated on me. I wasn't raised to make people cry so I tried to be understanding in the situation. She is so bad that she is still crying about her previous boyfriend while telling me that I'm the best boyfriend ever. So I don't know how to break it to her without crushing her. Any ideas?
By ifunnybatman - 22/03/2016 04:03 - United States - Roswell
ifunnybatman tells us more.
My husband had actually wanted kids more than I did. We were together 5 years before marriage he had never mentioned this before and we didn't have unprotected sex until the night we were married. Our son is 4 and these accusations sprung up after he read some stupid mock article about how one blow to the jewels can completely ruin a guy. I actually considered him rather smart up until this point Lol. He tried to claim he was joking once all the test came back but I know he wasn't. He hasn't treated our son any different though thank God. Anyway sorry for the long reply anymore questions I'll try to answer them. TL;DR: Husband is an idiot tried to play it off like a joke didn't work.
By Anonymous - 16/08/2016 08:26 - United States - Wasilla
OP here. For some clarification, it was only our second time hanging out. I did introduce him to my guy friend so he wouldn't feel insecure. We were all leaving, I hugged my friend bye since to me, that is just a casual thing, and he went crazy. I'm just glad I found out what he's like early on.