By StephD - 20/03/2009 03:41 - Canada
orange101
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Orange101's favorite FMLs
NO SNACKS
By face - 25/03/2009 05:45 - United States
By Truan - 25/03/2009 21:04 - United States
Truan_fml tells us more.
By Anonymous - 29/03/2009 05:04 - United States
Show us what you can do
By easilyexited - 01/04/2009 12:16 - United States
Cute but… TMI
By heytherexo - 05/04/2009 02:10 - United States
Meat is murder
By lanbon182 - 10/04/2009 05:11 - United States
Avoidance
By Kelavmeister - 17/04/2009 01:16 - United States
By whymommywhy - 21/04/2009 03:11 - United States
By DonMare - 22/04/2009 07:48 - Australia
By jdubious - 28/04/2009 07:47 - United States
jdubious tells us more.
OK, here is the story. I work as an auto service tech at a dealership. We have a big board of keys for the customer cars. It is set up this way because the techs, advisers, valets and wash guys all need quick access to the keys. I was pulling this customers car into the shop for repairs. Every pepper spray I have ever seen(before yesterday) has come in an upright cylinder. They spray at a right angle and are equipped with a snap down style trigger safety at the top. They often come in a leather holster. There is no mistaking what these are. This particular pepper spray was in a small torpedo shaped, red case. The case was colored but it was clear as well. I could just make out the cylinder through the plastic. I mistook the cylinder as a AA battery which supported my flashlight theory. The trigger was a spring loaded, slide-forward type and it was located on the side of the case. The trigger didn't have an active safety and it resembled a switch. Also, this device discharged straight out the end. Check out the website I've included (down at the bottom) to see the real thing. Look at the refills as well and you can see the bottom does in fact look like a battery. First, I pointed the device away from me and pushed down on the button and nothing happened. Then I noticed that the lever slid forward, again nothing happened. I was starting to wonder what the hell kind of flashlight this was. With the lever still slid forward it I looked into the end(to see if it even had a bulb in it) and it discharged into my eye. In order to discharge you had to slide forward then push down. This is their so called "automatic safety". The pain was pretty intense! My coworker guided to the water hose where I flushed my eyes and face for about 20 minutes. As long as I had cool water on my face the pain was manageable. As soon as I took the water away it did in fact feel as if my face was on fire. After I felt slightly better, my right eye was all bloodshot and face was all red. One coworker said it looked like I got hit with a softball. Within 45 minutes there was no pain at all and my face had pretty much returned to normal. THE GOOD: I only took a short .25 second burst I sprayed myself in the face and spared my coworkers There was a water hose nearby THE BAD: I took a .25 second burst of pepper spray! It hit me right in the eye It burned like a bastard THE UGLY: My face just after the whole ordeal #3 Yep, that's me #4 I like gadgets #6 I would post to youtube myself if I had the footage #10 THANK YOU! #13 I truly feel your pain #14 see #13 #19 Sure did, and to top it all off it is called "The Spitfire" #24 THANK YOU! I guess the rest of you a-holes would pepper spray the key cutting guy for looking at your Welcome to Las Vegas keychain #31 A guy who totally gets the point of this story #39 THANK YOU! #48 A very accurate description #49 I understand your thinking but this did happen just yesterday, and I'm the jackass who did it #50 A very valid point
Look out!
By station - 05/05/2009 05:10 - United States
By MJ3105 - 07/05/2009 11:36 - Israel
By Anonymous - 08/05/2009 11:37 - United States
By dwek - 15/05/2009 11:07 - United Kingdom
By penguinsfan - 16/05/2009 14:47 - Canada
Code pink
By sonofmilf - 17/05/2009 05:46 - United States
By Anonymous - 17/05/2009 11:32 - United Kingdom
By tsakashvili - 26/05/2009 04:38 - United States
By Anonymous - 31/05/2009 17:34 - United States
OP here I'll clear a few things. First off, no I'm not that dude who got a comment from his girl's grandfather. Although that would be great, it's not me. Second...as for our inability to do it...well I didn't have a clear view. and I couldn't get a good grip on the ball because I fingerbanged her prior, so my hand was...well you get it her hands were lubed up, so same problem. I couldn't see them well enough to unhook them, and she couldn't do a damn thing with them either. It took about 5 minutes before we decided to call anyone. My brother and dad weren't in the house, and obviously if I called a friend, my mom would have to show them in I got the tongue ring for my 18th birthday (2 weeks ago), so obviously moving out isn't going to be an instant thing. Oh and my mom's a nurse, so she just looked at us both staring at her awkwardly, laughed, and undid it. We haven't spoke about it since. Honestly, I think it's pretty funny. What's really funny is those of you idiots who don't understand the exhilaration of a piercing.