By Anonymous - 24/01/2014 05:32 - United States - Hackensack
You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
You used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…
An FML submitted between 5 and 6 a.m. can't be very good.
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by Alan, our moderator.
You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 a.m.
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 a.m.
Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already added 50 FMLs to your favourites list!
You have shared 20 FMLs on Twitter, your followers love you and we understand why.
You've received 68 Hugs on your profile. Kinky.
See, son, moderating FMLs is like a marathon.
200 "I agree" votes is a good start.
You made your 500th "You deserved it" vote.
You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
You have thumbed 5000 comments.
You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.
You have voted "You deserved it" over 100 times.
You've commented on an FML that you sent in
Clicking to reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried afterwards is even worthier.
Voting on an FML in the "Work" category on a Monday morning between 8 and 9 a.m. How ironic.
There were only 100 numbered VDM diaries for 2011/2012. I've got one.
By Anonymous - 24/01/2014 05:32 - United States - Hackensack
By molliciousj - 19/02/2014 05:09 - United States - Houston
By ThatGuyWithFMLs - 25/02/2014 09:31 - Japan - Osaka
Yeah, I was pretty surprised that with all the things on his desk, he saw the cactus as a way to put me in my place haha.
By lacy - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States - Louisville
By Anonymous - 01/03/2014 10:42 - United States - Richmond
By nerdlette - 15/03/2014 19:34 - United States - Newport News
By cantprovenothing - 18/04/2014 21:31 - United States - Arlington
By flufee2 - 23/04/2014 02:40 - Canada - Burlington
The person i had ordering was a close friend of which i am very comfortable with. I guess you could say i got a little too comfortable! After we realized what I did, we just laughed and brushed it off. From now on i will make sure i wear gloves because I wouldn't want this to happen to anyone i don't know!
By mathesonn - 29/05/2014 23:32 - United States - Auburn
By and the truth comes out - 22/07/2014 08:44 - Canada - Courtenay
Okay, so this is embarrassing but you guys asked for it! First of all, I'm a receptionist at a vet hospital so I have a big soft spot for animals. When I saw the little creature run across the road I thought it could be someone's lost pet or a stray doggy looking for shelter. I couldn't just keep driving. The coyote was also pretty small so I assume it was a fairly young one. In my defense, it was super dark out and it's foresty where I live with little to no street lights so visibility is very limited. When I pulled over I saw a glimpse of the fuzz ball in my headlight, huddled under some bushes. I had a dog lead in my trunk that I took out just in case. The pup never saw me though so I was able to walk right up and swoop him. He squirmed a bit but not much which is surprising. Now, I've seen a ton of dogs come into the vet hospital that I work at which are half coyote or wolf and look very similar....so it's a real thing. I'm not entirely crazy. Ha. Anyways, upon setting the coyote in my car when he began freaking out and I turned the light on, there was no mistaking that this was a wild animal. I was face to face with the little guy who was scared to death that he was trapped in a driving machine with an insane girl who picked up a feral animal. Haha. He was jumping around and pacing in my car. I got out and ran around to open the passenger side door. I left both doors open and as soon as he saw an escape he took it and ran off. Just so you know, there were no animals harmed in the happenings of this FML and no damage done to my car (although he did poop in it) but I feel like such a jerk. I'm sorry, poor little coyote. :(