Crank
By Anonymous - 29/03/2013 04:11 - United States - Houston
You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
200 "I agree" votes is a good start.
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already added 50 FMLs to your favourites list!
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 a.m.
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 a.m.
Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
You have thumbed 5000 comments.
You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
You made your 500th "You deserved it" vote.
You have voted "You deserved it" over 100 times.
You have shared 20 FMLs on Twitter, your followers love you and we understand why.
Clicking to reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried afterwards is even worthier.
You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
You've received 68 Hugs on your profile. Kinky.
By Anonymous - 29/03/2013 04:11 - United States - Houston
By notagyno - 29/03/2013 14:19 - Romania - Bucharest
By dating walter white's gf apparently - 06/04/2013 19:13 - United Kingdom
By moosy0_o - 07/04/2013 19:22 - Netherlands - Berlicum
By Anonymous - 12/04/2013 15:34 - United States
By Gurior - 16/04/2013 17:44 - Canada
By some people's parents - 18/04/2013 04:01 - United States - Aurora
By Anonymous - 20/04/2013 16:34 - Thailand
By BIGCHEIFAAA - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Union City
By Anonymous - 29/04/2013 07:25 - France
By Annonymous_Dad - 01/05/2013 23:22 - United States - Fort Wayne
My dog IS trained. Generally, he just needs to be told "heel" or "quiet" and he obeys. However, ever since the baby has come home ( 3 weeks) hes gone into super protective mode. A car door slams and hes "killer guard dog". Its getting ridiculous and I do get exasperated when it happens multiple times within a half hour. He DOES listen when I yell, because its not something I have ever done with him. Afterwards, however, we go through the "heel" command and give treats. He just hasnt settled down yet! Maybe Ill just start yelling "Heel Killer!!" ( totally kidding, calm down, no more yelling for me)
By MommaAnnie - 02/05/2013 15:59 - United States - Overland Park
By Who1s269 - 03/05/2013 12:13 - United States
By prostitott - 04/05/2013 07:22
By SkeetinKeaton - 06/05/2013 06:29 - United States
By brokedad - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States
By Anonymous - 16/05/2013 20:54 - United States - Woodbridge
By Uncomfortable - 17/05/2013 07:21
By LightsOut - 21/05/2013 22:47 - United States - Melbourne
By Anonymous - 24/05/2013 21:43 - Iceland - Akureyri
OP here. A few comments: the cashier was a guy, not a girl. I don't know why most of you think that. Also, there were two elderly people waiting in line who were laughing and berating me as some of the commenters here are doing. And I'm a woman from Belgium, not the Netherlands (but FML didn't ask for my country when I posted it). I WAS already out of the store and going home when I noticed it, so I needed to go back into the store, wait for a slow customer to pay while the rest of the cue was wondering why I was standing there like a complete idiot, and then explain to the cashier why I wanted to pay for the bread. By the way, the freshly baked, honestly-payed-for, Italian bun was delicious, after I had cleansed my palate from the disgusting comments I received.