Relatable

Unboyfriendable

By Emotional Damage - 25/02/2025 15:00 - United States

Today, my little cousin, who just got a boyfriend, found out I've been single my whole life. She asked, "Is it because you're really ugly and awkward?" Yes. Yes, it is. FML

I agree, your life sucks 508

You deserved it 104

Stinker

By taman - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I took this girl out that I've been crushing on for 2 years to a fancy restaurant. At one point during the date, I had to get up to take a massive dump. As I was walking back to the table, a little boy stood up and shouted, "THAT'S THE POOPOO MAN!" in front of the whole restaurant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 437

You deserved it 5 481

Practicality

By Nicole C - 25/02/2025 09:00 - United States

Today, my long-distance boyfriend of 2 years left me for another girl he’s known for 3 months, just because she’s closer. Never mind that I was the one who remained faithful to him for 2 long years, got him through the deaths of his parents, gave him money when he fell on hard times, among other things. FML

I agree, your life sucks 502

You deserved it 155

Ninja!

By Today I closed every door on every floor of my building - 23/02/2025 16:00 - United States - Hampstead

Today, I went searching for my cat who'd escaped. Of course, I searched the entire building and somehow she'd got back in through my front door of my apartment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 332

You deserved it 96

Pipe down!

By Anonymous - 23/02/2025 20:00 - Canada

Today, I woke up to the sound of my roommate vacuuming at 7 a.m. I was annoyed because I had stayed up late, but then I realized she was vacuuming in the kitchen… at 7 a.m. because the broom "wasn't powerful enough." I gave her the benefit of the doubt until she started vacuuming my bedroom floor while I was still in bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 411

You deserved it 97

That one special feeling

By Chris - 23/02/2025 15:00 - United States - Newark

Today, I went to a job interview, and halfway through my perfectly rehearsed answers, my stomach started growling loudly. I tried to keep calm, but then it let out the most embarrassing noise I’ve ever heard. The interviewer paused what he was saying, then said, "Are you hungry or do you need to fart?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 467

You deserved it 102

Been there, done that

By Anonymous - 21/02/2025 11:00 - United Kingdom - Sheffield

Today, after a year and a half of being with who I thought was the love of my life, we broke up. It was mutual, and even though they emotionally cheated in the beginning, hiding messages, and lying to me about things, I feel like a failure for not making it work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 415

You deserved it 129

There's still hope, somewhere…

By John - 21/02/2025 08:00

Today, like every day for the past few weeks, I watched the richest man in the world, who was never elected to any office, tear my government apart to make himself and his friends richer. We're so fucked. I'm so afraid for my family and loved ones. I don't know how to cope or protect them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 766

You deserved it 478

Dank

By Anonymous - 19/02/2025 15:00 - Canada

Today, I woke up to a weird smell in my apartment. I checked everywhere but couldn’t find the source. After a while, I discovered the smell was coming from the pile of laundry I'd left in the corner, laundry that I thought was clean. It was the gym clothes I'd thrown in there three weeks ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 81

You deserved it 628

Apocalypse snow

By Anonymous - 18/02/2025 06:00 - United States

Today, I shoveled the driveway because there's enough snow to block my car. Overnight we're supposed to get six more inches of snow. It's like shoveling the driveway is a waste of time because more snow gets piled on it the next day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 334

You deserved it 148

I like what I like

By Anime - 17/02/2025 03:00 - Poland - Poznan

Today, I realized that after years of watching Hentai I can only ejaculate while hearing Anime voices. FML

I agree, your life sucks 97

You deserved it 659

New model

By Anonymous - 16/02/2025 15:00 - United States - Milwaukee

Today, the man I've been with for ten years left me for a coworker he's known for three months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 559

You deserved it 84

Sacrifice

By Anonymous - 15/02/2025 09:00 - United States - Gainesville

Today, it's Valentine’s Day and the woman for whom I gave up my traveling $100,000 day job, and two luxurious vehicles for a trailer and a dog, now says she doesn’t want to get married because I have to work a POS job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 190

You deserved it 654

Losing my mind

By Anonymous - 15/02/2025 06:00 - United States

Today, I checked my jacket pocket for my smartphone, all while still holding my smartphone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 125

You deserved it 390

The spark is gone

By Anonymous - 10/02/2025 14:00 - United States - Orange Park

Today, my husband of 16 years had to force himself to be intimate with me. In his words, not because he’s not attracted to me but because he no longer has emotions or feelings towards me. I’m still deeply in love and had to force intimacy because now I feel like I’m just a means to an end. FML

I agree, your life sucks 465

You deserved it 144

Overconfident

By Anonymous - 10/02/2025 09:00 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I tried carrying all my groceries inside in one trip. I succeeded, but also succeeded in tearing the handles, dropping everything, and rolling a can of soup straight under my neighbor’s car. Never trust cheap tote bags. FML

I agree, your life sucks 176

You deserved it 390

There's still hope, then?

By Anonymous - 08/02/2025 20:00 - Nigeria

Today, I think I've finally lost my girl. I think she stopped liking me a while ago, but I didn't ask because I was afraid of the answer. We haven't texted in almost two days now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 149

You deserved it 440

Parents of the year

By Anonymous - 07/02/2025 14:00

Today, I got to experience the rare pleasure of overhearing my divorcing parents admit that neither of them want full custody of me, or even shared custody, and then planning to guilt one of my grandparents into accepting custody instead. God I hate them both. FML

I agree, your life sucks 806

You deserved it 104

Highly relatable

By Alexa, play "Lazy" by Deep Purple - 07/02/2025 05:00 - United States

Today, I woke up and did the same thing I do at the start of every day: lie in my bed and stare up at the ceiling for who knows how long, all while contemplating how little I've accomplished in my life. Depression sucks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 504

You deserved it 138

I'm OK, I swear

By Business - 06/02/2025 15:00 - Canada

Today, I walked into an office at work, ready to ask everyone a question. I then blanked and forgot why I was there the second everyone turned to look at me. I just stood there, nodded, and walked out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 373

You deserved it 133

Rocks

By Anonymous - 05/02/2025 12:00 - United States

Today, I baked my boyfriend his favorite cookies for his birthday. Well, I tried. I followed the recipe, but they somehow turned out diamond hard. When he tried to bite into one, he chipped a tooth. Instead of being mad, he laughed and said, “At least you tried.” Now I’m stuck with inedible cookies and a dentist's bill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 409

You deserved it 149

Thanks, YouTube!

By Okkkkkkk - 04/02/2025 20:00 - United States - Buffalo

Today, I tried to trim my beard before a date. I watched a YouTube tutorial and thought, "How hard could it be?" Turns out, very hard. I ended up with one side of my beard looking fabulous and the other side looking like a patch of dried grass. I had to cancel the date and spent the evening watching Netflix with my cats. FML

I agree, your life sucks 120

You deserved it 551

Choose your path to happiness

By Anonymous - 03/02/2025 02:00 - United Kingdom

Today, our daughter got in a fight with her dad because she isn’t sure if marrying her boyfriend will make her happy. Her dad then said, "Well which do you want, to be happy or to be married? Because you can’t have both." We’ve been married for 32 years so it hurt hearing him say that. It hurt a lot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 641

You deserved it 166

Get me out of here!

By Anonymous - 31/01/2025 05:00 - Saudi Arabia - Khobar

Today, my family is very toxic and they become more toxic every day. The real FML is that I can't do anything about it or leave, so I have to wait until I have enough money to leave. So, until that faraway dream becomes true, FML

I agree, your life sucks 416

You deserved it 116

Seven against one

By Anonymous - 29/01/2025 11:00 - United Kingdom - Lerwick

Today, I am living a nightmare. My mother is now friends with my wife and my mother-in-law, plus my sister is now friends with my wife’s sisters. All that needs to happen now is they all get together in the same room and my life will be over; it will be a 7 on 1 massacre, and I’ll be the 1. FML

I agree, your life sucks 192

You deserved it 484

The more you know

By Jeff - This FML is from back in 2019 but it's good stuff

Today, I found out that women have another hole that they pee out of. I'm 37. FML

I agree, your life sucks 762

You deserved it 3 533

Chubbyemu vibes

By Anonymous - 28/01/2025 16:00 - United States - New York

Today, it's been three months since I had a GI virus. In this time, all the tests I've done so far came out negative at the doctor's. I've changed my diet, haven't drank alcohol, nor was I a habitual drinker. The bouts of nausea and vomiting keep coming back on random days. I cannot get the right amount of nutrients. FML

I agree, your life sucks 449

You deserved it 63

Rise and grind

By Gwen - 27/01/2025 17:00 - United States

Today, I'm two days deep into a semester at a trade school, pulling doubles. I was supposed to only work 4 days a week, which would've been totally manageable. But, because the weather was total crap the first week, now I'm stuck working 80-hour weeks for the next month including those Fridays. FML

I agree, your life sucks 421

You deserved it 123

A rock and a hard place

By Anonymous - 27/01/2025 06:00 - United States - Orange Park

Today, I’ve been having an affair with my cousin’s husband for the last 16 years. For 3-ish months, when my husband gets drunk, he accuses us of cheating & threatens to tell everyone. Sober, he remembers nothing. We are constantly worried he will tell but are too in love to end it. Both in bad marriages. FML

I agree, your life sucks 110

You deserved it 1 918

Don't give up

By Anonymous - 26/01/2025 14:00 - Turkey - Mamak

Today, I realized that for my entire life I haven't felt genuine romantic love for anyone, despite being with many. I've taken care of people and made them happy all the time, but in the end I never really loved anyone, except one person, but it's too late in my life to go back and change things. FML

I agree, your life sucks 408

You deserved it 182

FML on Facebook

Keywords

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The Top

Today, my girlfriend and I found out that if I'm tickled it causes me to have a panic attack until I cry. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 766

You deserved it 1 231

Today, I awoke at 3am to a discoloured, swollen and excruciatingly painful left foot. After a visit to the doctor and a CT scan, I was diagnosed with gout - AKA the “rich man’s disease.” I am by no means rich and can barely pass as a man, but still get the agonising condition nonetheless. FML

I agree, your life sucks 320

You deserved it 116

Today, I "woofed" at a man on a gay dating site before realizing he's my Psych professor. Now during every lecture I'll never forget his nipples are pierced. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 649

You deserved it 1 614

Today, at Christmas dinner, my grandmother talked about the death of every single dog she ever had. All 10 of them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 145

You deserved it 2 758

Today, while texting my boyfriend, I noticed that he copies and pastes old messages so he doesn't have to write new ones. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 127

You deserved it 5 796

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. The constant harassment, threats and stalking by my ex-wife have finally driven her away. This is the third time this has happened. My ex physically beat the other two up, and now she’s scared away the one I wanted to marry. The courts have done nothing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 944

You deserved it 149