shekezim

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Seattle , US
35 years-old
Saturday 18 August 1990
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Shekezim's favorite FMLs

By Garry - 04/03/2010 12:43 - United Kingdom

Today, I realised that my staff doesn't take me seriously. I walked in on my chef, who had just spent an hour and half carving a block of cheese to make cheddar goggles for himself. When I confronted him, he pulled up his t-shirt to reveal a cocktail sausage taped to his stomach. FML

agreeclassic 24 006

vote type 1 5 756

By Juggalette - 29/01/2010 00:14 - United States

Today, I was working at IHOP serving a table full of drunk idiots. After an hour of taking care of them I went to clean up their mess to find the tip they had left me. On a napkin a girl had wrote "Here's your tip for the night: Don't play leap frog with unicorns." FML

agreeclassic 34 396

vote type 1 3 223

Juggalette1020 app_comment_confession_title

Juggalette1020 0

Monday 1 February 2010 2:29

Umm. The only reason It happened because we were just starting 3rd shit at that IHOP And the only people who realized that we were open were the drunk people. So there's bound to be assholes. And I deserve it for my name? Ummm No.

Egg mode

By KillahCam - 26/01/2010 00:15 - United States

Today, my ten year-old brother told me that his thirteen year-old friend took one of my bras and two pairs of my underwear a few weeks ago. Apparently he took them out of my room, put them on, and has been sleeping with them ever since. He's coming to give them back tomorrow. FML

agreeclassic 34 153

vote type 1 2 606

By Ben - 25/01/2010 03:31 - United States

Today, I was talking this pretty religious girl that I like. We were playing a game and I asked her if she could go back in history and meet anyone who would it be. She said Jesus. Without thinking I said "I mean someone that was real." FML

agreeclassic 20 300

vote type 1 47 743

By Anonymous - 26/03/2009 16:36 - United States

Today, my girlfriend came up to me and told me we would never do anything sexual in our relationship. She said I was too adorable to take seriously in bed. FML

agreeclassic 137 122

vote type 1 10 559