OPrime9

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Oprime9's favorite FMLs

Smoking is so cool

By Burnt - this FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I accidentally set my hair on fire while lighting a cigarette. I panicked and put it out by slapping myself in the face. FML

agreeclassic 10 901

vote type 1 61 561

By Anonymous - 29/04/2011 06:29 - United States

Today, while being robbed, a man heroically chased down the robber and got my purse back. He then looked at the distance between us, turned the other way and ran off with it. FML

agreeclassic 50 441

vote type 1 3 773

By Cecilly2010 - 28/04/2011 15:53

Today, my drunk dad started yelling at my dog for not having a job. FML

agreeclassic 50 688

vote type 1 5 311

By Anonymous - 26/02/2011 20:19 - United States

Today, I found out why my cell phone has been going missing every night for the last few months. My sister has been "borrowing" it so she can hold it against her crotch and repeatedly push the vibrate button. FML

agreeclassic 59 533

vote type 1 5 182

By Christopher - 13/12/2010 09:16 - Canada

Today, the elevator got stuck in between floor 4 and 5 at my doctors office. I had been having violent diarrhea. It was the reason I was at the doctor. Elevator was stuck for 35 minutes. During that time, I diarrhea'd in my pants twice. There were seven other people in the elevator. FML

agreeclassic 111 828

vote type 1 6 192