maddilee

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Maddilee's favorite FMLs

The bitch is back

By thatsucks - 28/02/2009 11:10 - United Kingdom

Today, my husband dropped me off at work. Ten minutes later, I got a text saying, "I just dropped the bitch off, I'll be there in a few baby, miss you". I later asked him about it. He said, "Megan, I have no idea what you're talking about." My name isn't Megan. Not even close. FML

agreeclassic 1 291 210

vote type 1 143 525

By Anonymous - 23/06/2012 13:11 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, my parents were awake while I was still in bed on my iPod touch. I decided to play The Smurfs Village. One of its minigames involves shaking the iPod, so I was breathing heavily. Later, my parents sat me down for a little "talk". FML

agreeclassic 26 784

vote type 1 7 808

By blah56 - 23/06/2012 05:17 - United States - Vine Grove

Today, my husband put some photos of our wedding on Facebook. He named the album "FML". FML

agreeclassic 34 548

vote type 1 3 559

By ExplosiveDildo - 22/06/2012 13:08 - Afghanistan

Today, I was having a funny conversation with a guy I had met on Xbox. I told him the state I lived in, and he said, "Don't tell me that, I might stalk you." He wasn't kidding. He has somehow found out my phone number, and my address. He says he's going to send me flowers. FML

agreeclassic 16 553

vote type 1 37 026

ExplosiveDildo app_comment_confession_title

ExplosiveDildo 11

Saturday 23 June 2012 5:21

Holy shit. I didn't think this would actually get posted! Well, I'm happy after all of the FML's I've posted over the years, this one got chosen

Show off

By a stupid jackass - 22/06/2012 01:28 - United States - New York

Today, I got lunch with a girl I really like. On the way, for some idiotic reason I decided it would be a good idea to show off by jumping up to high-five the red hand on a traffic sign. I ended up slipping and slamming full-force into the pole. I now have a bruise on my face. FML

agreeclassic 7 941

vote type 1 37 574