Unbansawsage

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Unbansawsage's favorite FMLs

By Anonymous - 31/07/2016 14:19

Today, I got punched in the face after I beat my stepbrother at Mario Kart. I didn't really get hurt, but he managed to break a finger. My stepmom blamed the whole thing on me, accusing me of being violent and a bad influence on her son. FML

agreeclassic 16 006

vote type 1 885

By why mom - 02/08/2016 23:52

Today, my straight, white, Christian stepmother greeted my black friend with, "Hey my n****a!" He hasn't talked to me since. FML

agreeclassic 17 464

vote type 1 1 393

By Anonymous - 27/07/2016 15:24 - United States - Coshocton

Today, my mom grabbed my phone, said she was taking it because I'd been disrespectful, and hung up my call. I'd been speaking with a work client. This is the gratitude I get for paying all her bills for the past 2 years, all because she's too lazy to get a job. FML

agreeclassic 19 020

vote type 1 1 938

By NeitherHrotsvitNorErkembaldus - 29/07/2016 21:21 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I learned that the hardest part of marrying a historian is choosing baby names. His top choices derive from two Roman magistrates, two abbesses, a tenth-century author, and an obscure Greek official. I already let him name our pug, for whom he chose the name "Tertullianus." FML

agreeclassic 14 634

vote type 1 1 513

All figured out

By Toroka - 29/07/2016 18:59

Today, I had to spend two hours in the car with my mother. That doesn't sound so bad until you realize she's the kind of person who can, and did, spend nearly half an hour ranting about how the Big Beautiful Woman porn niche is the root of obesity in America. FML

agreeclassic 14 016

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