danadana211

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Danadana211's favorite FMLs

The bitch is back

By thatsucks - 28/02/2009 11:10 - United Kingdom

Today, my husband dropped me off at work. Ten minutes later, I got a text saying, "I just dropped the bitch off, I'll be there in a few baby, miss you". I later asked him about it. He said, "Megan, I have no idea what you're talking about." My name isn't Megan. Not even close. FML

agreeclassic 1 291 211

vote type 1 143 525

By peejay6831 - 23/09/2013 06:27 - United States

Today, one of my regular customers asked when we were getting married. I told him as much as I would love that, I didn't think my boyfriend would be very happy. He called me a "stuck up b*tch" and informed me he only comes to my line because he can always see through my shirt. He is 72. And married. FML

agreeclassic 44 845

vote type 1 4 926

peejay6831 app_comment_confession_title

peejay6831 16

Tuesday 24 September 2013 4:41

I wear a mandatory black polo at work that's easily a quarter inch thick, seeing through it isn't even possible! I just told him to have a nice day.. pretty sure he missed his meds

By vrossie_ - 08/09/2013 05:56 - United States

Today, my mom was sharing the story of how I was born with the umbilical cord around my neck. My sister added that it was God's first attempt to kill me off. FML

agreeclassic 55 758

vote type 1 4 211

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Monday 9 September 2013 21:43

Yea it was clever. I shared it to my Biology class and they all laughed.

By fetch boy.. - 05/08/2013 05:28 - United States - Bellmore

Today, my boyfriend's parents found out we had a sleepover while they were on vacation. His dog had retrieved the underwear I had unknowingly left and brought them to his mom. FML

agreeclassic 40 540

vote type 1 18 332

Deep sleep

By Anonymous - 04/08/2013 19:28 - United States - Scottsdale

Today, I woke up to my girlfriend grinning at me, her hand on my junk. I grinned back, then looked down and saw blood smeared all over her hand and my junk. After I started screaming and crying, she laughed and said it was fake blood. She recorded everything. FML

agreeclassic 74 896

vote type 1 9 864