andrew__barrera

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Andrew__barrera's favorite FMLs

Acting out

By itsgotime - 20/03/2009 06:11 - United States

Today, I was running to my car, slipped, and slammed my head on the car door. I started driving to the hospital because it was bleeding profusely and I was dizzy, I called my mom to tell her what had happened. She said I was grounded for "goofing off" and that she was "sick of my shit". FML

agreeclassic 98 395

vote type 1 7 912

By Anonymous - 02/04/2016 09:23 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, my sister called me a moron after I told her that no, healthy foods do not give you "negative calories". She's 21 and goes around telling everyone that she's an expert nutritionist. FML

agreeclassic 21 522

vote type 1 1 648

By Anonymous - 30/03/2016 13:25 - United States - Sacramento

Today, I was at the mall with my mom, when I saw a little pamphlet about a charity for abused children. I showed her and said I was going to donate a few dollars. She quickly said no, calling it a waste of money and muttering that the kids probably deserved it anyway. FML

agreeclassic 21 597

vote type 1 1 829

By Anonymous - 23/03/2016 16:06 - United States - Bellevue

Today, an old guy with a cane got up in my face for "mocking" the way he walked. In retrospect, I guess it is pretty offensive for me to have had knee surgery and still be recovering from it. My apologies. FML

agreeclassic 23 500

vote type 1 1 429

Make it stop

By shitty shit - 26/05/2015 15:40 - United States - Carmel

Today, I was looking at old pictures with my mom and saw one of myself crying in kindergarten. I asked why I was crying. She said that was the day a boy kissed me on the cheek, and I thought I'd gotten pregnant. She then decided to give me the sex talk. FML

agreeclassic 36 235

vote type 1 3 907