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xOpheliacx

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Paulsboro, New Jersey
34 years-old
Friday 18 January 1991
Not specified

A propos de Xopheliacx

I hate stupid people who think their lives are fucked because of something that's not a big deal. And I hate the people that mod and say 'yes' to those "FML"s. Message me if you wanna talk and aren't an "Add me" whore or a creeper. =] http://www.myspace.com/katelizabethf

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Xopheliacx's favorite FMLs

Bigmouth strikes again

By Anonymous - 09/09/2009 09:58 - New Zealand

Today, I was working at a hospital-level rest home. I was making the rounds when I noticed a woman was sitting in her (electric) wheelchair in the middle of the hall. Going closer, I saw her battery was flat so I said, "Uh-oh! Looks like you've died." She bawled her eyes out and said, "Not yet." FML

agreeclassic 16 536

vote type 1 54 651

Manly man

By takinabreak - this FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was taking a shower and I saw a new body wash that said "Radiance Ribbons." That sounded a little effeminate, but it smelled manly enough and the only alternative was normal soap, so I used it. Just now, I stepped out into the sun and found out what "Radiance Ribbons" means. I sparkle. FML

agreeclassic 66 243

vote type 1 33 878

By Flicker - 14/05/2009 07:23 - Australia

Today, my football club gave us all jerseys with our last names on them. My last name is 'Flicker'. The letters are all in uppercase. And the 'L' and the 'I' are joined together at the bottom. My jersey reads 'FUCKER'. FML

agreeclassic 472

vote type 1 51

By Anonymous - 20/04/2009 17:55 - United States

Today, I was at the gynecologist and he was performing a routine check-up. He was a new doctor and I was just slightly uncomfortable with him. About mid-check-up, as he felt around my uterus, he said in a cartoonish voice, "Oh, it's so squishy up here." The doctor turned me into a sock puppet. FML

agreeclassic 530

vote type 1 37

By Anonymous - 02/04/2009 05:13 - United States

Today, I came home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on my bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read "Because you can't find a real girl, I made your current one prettier, Love Mom." FML

agreeclassic 512

vote type 1 153