lkenney

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Lkenney's favorite FMLs

By Noname - 25/02/2009 01:20 - United States

Today, I went to get a condom because my boyfriend and I were going to have sex for the first time. When I opened the drawer, I saw that every single condom had a Jesus pin stabbed through it, and a note on top of the box saying, "Love, mom." FML

agreeclassic 136 029

vote type 1 24 466

By Scarlett - 26/04/2011 17:28 - United States

Today, my husband got out of the shower, came downstairs naked screaming ''EMBRACE THE HARDNESS!!'' Little did he know, my step mother was sitting right there at the kitchen table. FML

agreeclassic 50 673

vote type 1 6 160

By Screwed in Seattle - 05/02/2011 16:13 - United States

Today, I woke up with a migrane, so I took one of my prescription migrane pills to get me through my day. The pill made me dizzy and nauseous, so I took a motion-sickness pill. That pill gave me a migrane. FML

agreeclassic 32 946

vote type 1 5 480

By Anonymous - 28/01/2011 11:44 - United States

Today, at work, a homeless woman called me trash, threw her coffee at me, and told me to get a job. I do have a job. It's homeless outreach. FML

agreeclassic 33 485

vote type 1 3 332

Birthday Girl

By Anonymous - 14/05/2009 17:43 - United States

Today, it's my birthday. I got just three calls all day. The first one was my fiancé, saying he wanted his ring back. The second one was my best friend, confessing to me that she had been sleeping with my fiancé for the past three months. The third was the dentist's office, to sing me a happy birthday. FML

agreeclassic 414 148

vote type 1 21 919