heysammi

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Somewhere in California, USA
29 years-old
Tuesday 29 October 1996
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Heysammi's favorite FMLs

By deez_nutz - 10/03/2009 12:46 - Canada

Today, it was my birthday. My girlfriend bought me a Nickelback CD. FML

agreeclassic 91 593

vote type 1 29 297

Snarky

By great - 10/02/2012 21:33 - United States

Today, I sat in my boss's office as he bitched me out for being "too sarcastic" to our customers. After nearly half an hour of him criticizing my "piss-poor attitude," he asked me what I was going to do to fix it. Without thinking, I said, "Your mom." Now I'm jobless again. FML

agreeclassic 10 573

vote type 1 75 303

Sketchy

By Notadrinkanddriveidiot - this FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, some friends and I were pulled over on our way back from a party. We'd had a few drinks, so we tried to play it cool just in case we were over the limit. The cop didn't seem to want to breathalyze us, until my really high friend in the backseat said, "These are not the droids you are looking for." FML

agreeclassic 15 776

vote type 1 47 657

By G. Briones - 23/11/2011 19:14

Today, my brother lost his first tooth, so I told him the tooth fairy is going to give him money. He now thinks The Rock is going to show up in his room. FML

agreeclassic 35 888

vote type 1 7 022

Blocking time

By tommyboy783 - 20/10/2011 01:38 - United States

Today, this weird girl started texting me. I really didn't want to talk to her, so I texted back, "This message could not be delivered because of a temporery network setup error. Error 2128-226110." She replied, "You spelt temporary wrong." FML

agreeclassic 12 103

vote type 1 66 696