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maliceinwonderla_fml

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Portland
37 years-old
Tuesday 26 April 1988
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A propos de Maliceinwonderla_fml

Before anyone decides to bother me about it: No, I did not steal this picture. It is actually me. Models can have FML accounts too. That being said, I\\\'m an alternative model in Portland. I enjoy video games, hiking, and obviously FML. Trolls can bugger off. To every decent person on here: Hi! ^-^

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Maliceinwonderla_fml's favorite FMLs

By RC3Welly - 09/03/2012 22:58 - United States

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

agreeclassic 800

vote type 1 1 942

It burns

By WTF - 16/03/2011 22:05

Today, after my 22-year-old son realized that there was no more contact solution, he decided to use tequila because he thought it would "kill the germs." We had to go to the hospital to have his eyes flushed out. I raised this moron. FML

agreeclassic 47 546

vote type 1 12 571

Here's your login details

By Anonymous - this FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me by way of making me an account on an online dating site. He then emailed me the account information and left. FML

agreeclassic 37 827

vote type 1 3 554

By panda - 03/03/2011 11:20

Today, the dog went nuts at 3am. I searched the yard with a spotlight and machete. Nothing. He may actually just be an asshole. FML

agreeclassic 29 270

vote type 1 6 290

Creative mind

By Dean Heffern - this FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff

Today, I was paired up with a partner in my film class. He has an idea for a film: "Shoot an onion from all angles, light it on fire, and roll it down a hill." He was dead serious. I'm stuck with this guy for the whole year. FML

agreeclassic 33 560

vote type 1 4 220