splice520

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Fresh meadows, new york, United states
38 years-old
Thursday 23 April 1987
single

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Splice520's favorite FMLs

This is fine

By Anonymous - 16/07/2011 23:09 - United States

Today, I was given a DUI while in the Whataburger drive thru. FML

agreeclassic 12 874

vote type 1 46 321

By pigeons_suck - 11/05/2011 21:17 - United States

Today, I discovered what it feels like to get a ruptured sinus. More specifically, I discovered what it feels like to get a ruptured sinus from being hit in the face by a pigeon that was deflected from the windscreen of a van moving at about 35mph. FML

agreeclassic 33 436

vote type 1 2 807

By Anonymous - 18/04/2011 03:12 - United States

Today, I was finally having sex with the man of my dreams, and then he fell asleep on top of me. FML

agreeclassic 44 644

vote type 1 8 242

By omg - 25/03/2011 00:43 - Canada

Today, I got a call from my 8 year-old son's teacher. Apparently, my kid has been charging girls a quarter to touch his "special area." FML

agreeclassic 55 643

vote type 1 8 729

By fourfootnine - 07/03/2011 13:47 - United States

Today, I discovered that I'm short enough to be legally considered a midget. My daughter now wants to bring me to school for show and tell. FML

agreeclassic 45 743

vote type 1 4 394