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Jocelyn_Marie

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34 years-old
Sunday 26 May 1991
Not specified

A propos de Jocelyn_marie

My name is Jocelyn. I am 18. I am a high school gradate of Durfee. Class of 2oo9 baby!! I have a great boyfriend. Eric. Five.Tres.08. Forever and always mi amour. I love you. http://www.socialvibe.com/?r=34612 PLEASE CLICK THAT LINK TO HELP ME RAISE MONEY FOR THE ENVIRONMENT!!

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Jocelyn_marie's favorite FMLs

By dumbo - 30/07/2009 14:43 - United States

Today, my friends had ditched me for a party I hadn't been invited to so I was sitting home alone. The only other thing in my house was the mosquito I nicknamed Fred. I liked to watch Fred fly around and try to suck my blood. Twenty minutes later, I found Fred's dead body. I was actually sad. FML

agreeclassic 63 890

vote type 1 18 925

Sexy time

By Anonymous - 30/07/2009 09:23 - United States

Today, I tried to be sexy and put a condom on with my mouth. Instead, I inhaled it and my boyfriend broke three of my ribs giving me the Heimlich maneuver. FML

agreeclassic 25 517

vote type 1 59 462

By Squashed - 15/08/2009 06:13 - United States

Today, my 250 pound boyfriend was on top of me while we were making out. I actually passed out in the middle of it from not being able to breathe. FML

agreeclassic 53 134

vote type 1 22 865

By treegirl - 26/07/2009 05:57 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on his couch when suddenly I tried to get up. Before I could stand, he grabs onto me and says, "I'm a koala and you're my eucalyptus tree!" He then continued to latch onto me for a good five minutes pretending to eat my hair. FML

agreeclassic 592

vote type 1 124

By theregoesmyspermcount - 02/08/2009 22:45 - United States

Today, my 250 lb ex-Marine dad announced he was going to start randomly punching me in the crotch, without warning, to "improve my reflexes." FML

agreeclassic 69 871

vote type 1 5 707