shifty92

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Shifty92's favorite FMLs

By The Sbeak - 13/02/2009 15:54 - United States

Today, my boss called me into his office to show me the web site of a potential business partner. When he began to type 'virginia' into google, it auto-completed his search with his recent search for 'virgin boy assholes'. I have to go on business trip with him tomorrow. I'm a young guy. FML

agreeclassic 635

vote type 1 51

By SpLo0gIeR - 13/02/2012 15:30 - United States

Today, I got pulled over. When the cop asked where I was coming from, reflexively I said, "Your mom's house." FML

agreeclassic 11 764

vote type 1 55 025

SpLo0gIeR app_comment_confession_title

SpLo0gIeR 9

Monday 13 February 2012 21:00

Funny thing is he laughed and gave me a warning :)

By Kevin - 13/02/2012 06:00 - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because, I "always wear that stupid little hat." I'm Jewish. FML

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vote type 1 10 593

Snarky

By great - 10/02/2012 21:33 - United States

Today, I sat in my boss's office as he bitched me out for being "too sarcastic" to our customers. After nearly half an hour of him criticizing my "piss-poor attitude," he asked me what I was going to do to fix it. Without thinking, I said, "Your mom." Now I'm jobless again. FML

agreeclassic 10 573

vote type 1 75 303

By 1.30am - 10/02/2012 09:59 - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend dumped me by text at 1:30 am because he didn't want to give me "the dread of answering a phone call." When I asked him for an explanation, his reply was, "For what?" FML

agreeclassic 27 713

vote type 1 2 695