zbaltrip

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Zbaltrip's favorite FMLs

By RC3Welly - 09/03/2012 22:58 - United States

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

agreeclassic 800

vote type 1 1 942

By human torch - 18/03/2010 15:22 - United States

Today, my physics teacher accidentally lit me on fire. FML

agreeclassic 446

vote type 1 51

By thewordsicantsay - 25/02/2010 07:05 - Canada

Today, while waiting to do a presentation in class I felt someone flick my back, but when I turned around no one was there. It wasn't until I got up in front of the whole class that I felt my bra slowly sliding down my body. Turns out that the "flick" I felt was actually my bra clasp busting open. FML

agreeclassic 30 570

vote type 1 3 391

By zzdug - 08/02/2010 03:19 - United States

Today, I got mauled by a cat named Mr. Sprinkles. FML

agreeclassic 30 106

vote type 1 5 907

By nonameLiz - 03/02/2010 01:16 - United States

Today, I found out that you can get arrested for holding up a 'free hugs' sign. FML

agreeclassic 447

vote type 1 116