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chocolatetoes

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Lancaster, USA
40 years-old
Tuesday 19 February 1985
Not specified

A propos de Chocolatetoes

My name is Kat. I'm 5' 4", blonde (but don't act it), and have hazel eyes. I love spending free time on FML for a good laugh. I'm a nurse by profession, but have put work aside to take care of my father who was just diagnosed with cancer. I know...thats an FML in itself huh. I also love animals. I have 2 three legged cats, and a Pekingese. They are my kids. Keep up the hilarious FML's!

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Chocolatetoes's favorite FMLs

Bath time [GONE WRONG][CREEPYPASTA]

By noname - 27/12/2008 04:07 - France

Today, I was quietly having a bath when I felt something fall onto my shoulder blade. I glanced over my shoulder and saw what I thought were huge black spider legs. I screamed, completely hysterical, and I threw myself violently against a wall. It was my hair. FML

agreeclassic 40 319

vote type 1 23 919

By peepee. - 30/09/2010 03:17 - United States

Today, I told my boyfriend I had to go to the bathroom. He said, "Okay baby, go drop your load." He also used the same voice as when he talks to his cat. FML

agreeclassic 25 676

vote type 1 4 506

Slapped

By Username - this FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - France

Today, my mum suggested that I should take self-defence lessons just in case I ever get attacked. Jokingly, I said, "As long as I walk under street lamps, no one's going to touch me." She replied, "Well, you never know, they might mistake you for someone good looking." FML

agreeclassic 32 730

vote type 1 5 001

By milhouse86 - 27/09/2010 19:22 - United States

Today, I was changing in the back seat of my new truck when it started to roll backwards. In my haste to reach the brake, I hit my head and fell face first into the steering wheel. I then realized that it wasn't rolling. The car next to me was just pulling out. FML

agreeclassic 12 844

vote type 1 29 823

milhouse86 app_comment_confession_title

milhouse86 0

Tuesday 28 September 2010 1:16

yea, that would have sucked lol

By Anonymous - 27/09/2010 11:45 - United States

Today, I went on a first date to the movies. During the flick, I choked on a piece of popcorn. I took a gulp of soda and that got stuck as well. I finally got my breath back and let out the loudest burp I ever have. He looked at me and said, "Does this mean I can fart now?" FML

agreeclassic 19 626

vote type 1 30 243