jasmineee818

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Pacoimaaa, Usaaa
29 years-old
Friday 17 May 1996
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Jasmineee818's favorite FMLs

By Fucked - 16/01/2009 19:38 - United States

Today, my dog found my marijuana pipe and the bag it was in and brought it to my parents. FML

agreeclassic 14 557

vote type 1 40 850

By FYouBoyfriend - 30/08/2010 17:51 - United States

Today, my boyfriend questioned why I always put my shirts in the dryer right before wearing them. I told him it was because the dryer causes my shirts to regain their form and tightness. His response: "You should throw your vagina in there along with them." FML

agreeclassic 45 695

vote type 1 16 233

Moving on

By Peekaman - 15/08/2010 22:31 - United States

Today, I was riding the subway when a beautiful topless girl walked into my car and sat directly in front of me. Then, the train stopped abruptly and I banged my head. The girl was gone and I realized it had all been a dream. Then I realized I was supposed to get off 17 stops ago. FML

agreeclassic 21 045

vote type 1 42 486

By Haley. - 26/03/2010 23:58 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were trying to have intercourse for the first time. One minute into it, he got nervous and farted. What's worse is that his fart scared him, and he asked "What was that?" FML

agreeclassic 40 333

vote type 1 6 545

By Numbnuts - 08/03/2010 03:08 - United States

Today, I was really bored and decided to annoy my mom while she was doing the dishes. I walked up behind her, touched her shoulder, and said "Poke". She then donkey kicks me straight in the nuts saying "Kick". I know now to never bug my mom when she's in a bad mood. FML

agreeclassic 11 382

vote type 1 38 613