joeymont

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Joeymont's favorite FMLs

By 44haley44 - 12/07/2011 17:25 - United States

Today, I woke up to my pants off and my vibrator still on. I fell asleep masturbating. FML

agreeclassic 23 797

vote type 1 57 316

By Cowgirl_Up37 - 02/07/2011 20:54 - United States

Today, I was so hungover, I started yelling at inanimate objects. My mom walked in on me calling my cereal a "worthless piece of shit sent from the bowels of Hell." FML

agreeclassic 12 834

vote type 1 48 076

Amazing idea, idiots

By zain - this FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, at my job as a lifeguard, the kids in the pool decided to start a new game. The game involved spreading out to different parts of the pool and pretending to be drowning at the same time. Whoever was "saved" first, won. FML

agreeclassic 50 324

vote type 1 3 754

By Anonymous - 01/06/2011 18:06 - United States

Today, my daughter turned 18. She decided to use this day to tell me everywhere her and her boyfriends have had sex in my house to get revenge for being overprotective. FML

agreeclassic 25 575

vote type 1 63 176

By Anonymous - 31/05/2011 11:21

Today, I'm too sunburned to masturbate. Now I have nothing to do. FML

agreeclassic 23 786

vote type 1 69 889