TheGITP

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London, UK
32 years-old
Wednesday 01 September 1993
single

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Thegitp's favorite FMLs

By Anonymous - 02/04/2009 05:13 - United States

Today, I came home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on my bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read "Because you can't find a real girl, I made your current one prettier, Love Mom." FML

agreeclassic 512

vote type 1 153

By Anonymous - 12/07/2012 06:40 - United States - Houston

Today, an old guy approached me and asked if I had ever seen an elephant with white ears. I shook my head. He then pulled the pockets out of his shorts and whipped out his sex nose. FML

agreeclassic 38 386

vote type 1 4 741

By Concert Flatulent - 10/07/2012 04:44 - United States - Marshall

Today, I went to an orchestra concert. Halfway through the performance I had to fart really bad, so I decided to try and sneak it in while the orchestra was playing a loud exciting part. Just as I let it rip, there was a dramatic pause in the music. Everyone heard. FML

agreeclassic 15 999

vote type 1 29 201

By creeped out - 12/06/2012 18:28 - United States - Smithtown

Today, my identical twin sister's boyfriend walked over to me, and whispered in my ear, "I know what you look like naked." FML

agreeclassic 47 942

vote type 1 4 486

By fordneagles - 11/06/2012 05:56 - Australia - Perth

Today, I was using a public toilet when someone entered the stall next to mine. Instead of using the facilities, the person in there reached under the stall to steal my bag. Fortunately, I was holding the strap so they couldn't take it. Unfortunately, they decided to take my right shoe instead. FML

agreeclassic 32 937

vote type 1 2 316

fordneagles app_comment_confession_title

fordneagles 34

Monday 11 June 2012 15:40

Hey guys, I'm the OP, for those worried about the grossness of the floor, the cleaners had just been in (the wet floor sign was still there), so I just took off the other sandal and looked a bit of a bogan, but better than replacing everything in my wallet! And for the record, my bag was not on the floor, it was resting on my (previously sandalled) feet. I've never noticed any hooks in the stalls, but then I've never expected someone to try and nick my bag either.