Distruminox

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Distruminox's favorite FMLs

By Anonymous - 22/09/2015 02:47 - United States

Today, I had finally summoned the courage to break up with my boyfriend, something I've needed to do for a long time. Right before my speech, he presented me with tickets to my favorite band a month from now. FML

agreeclassic 24 963

vote type 1 6 008

By Anonymous - 04/09/2015 17:01 - United States - Lake Forest

Today, I showed my daughter video footage from a security camera that showed her using her employee key to enter the store I own, disarming the alarm, and stealing several very valuable items. Her defense? That someone had "photoshopped" the video. We'll see how that goes down in court. FML

agreeclassic 31 293

vote type 1 2 913

By Anonymous - 14/08/2015 15:08 - Denmark

Today, at my grandmother's funeral, my senile grandfather kept asking me "Where's granny? I've been looking for her, but I can't find her." FML

agreeclassic 34 645

vote type 1 1 670

By Anonymous - 02/04/2009 05:13 - United States

Today, I came home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on my bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read "Because you can't find a real girl, I made your current one prettier, Love Mom." FML

agreeclassic 512

vote type 1 153

By SwedishBozo - 15/03/2009 01:30 - United States

Today, my family and I were at a restaurant. We're Swedish and love talking about people in our language because no one ever understands here. I decided to comment about how ugly the girl at the next table was. She turned around and goes "Dra åt helvete." That's Swedish for "Go to hell." FML

agreeclassic 32 901

vote type 1 326 711