Special
By Lily - 08/01/2011 16:01 - United States
By Lily - 08/01/2011 16:01 - United States
By privatebathroomneeded - 16/12/2014 19:26 - United States - San Francisco
By Anonymous - 23/01/2016 05:51 - United States
By mmmretail - 25/05/2013 05:09 - Australia - Bairnsdale
By screwthewilderness - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States
By Norwegian - 02/06/2012 16:55 - Norway
By a little less poor at least - 21/04/2013 16:03 - United States - Cleveland
By Tarlachia - 15/08/2015 17:42 - United States - Apopka
By FootFlakes - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Boston
By scaredypants123 - 07/03/2014 15:41 - United States
By MisterT - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States
By queengarmin - 25/04/2015 20:42 - United States - Pacific Grove
OP here! Just to clarify, I didn't intentionally antagonize him and he didn't intentionally bite me. I was playing with my neighbor's retired therapy dog, and whilst trying to pull a toy from his mouth, he chomped down on my finger. It was most definitely an accident, and though it hurt like hell, we have forgiven each other and we're friends again. And I've learned my lesson about watching my fingers while playing with a dog.
By Distracted - 09/04/2015 20:11 - United States - Greenfield
By Mackdaddy - 07/02/2010 14:21 - United States
By hairy - 30/09/2013 21:59 - United Kingdom - Guildford
By sisterlylove - 10/01/2015 19:02 - United States - Hannibal
By Anonymous - 12/01/2011 18:47 - Ireland
By queenofdeath - 16/01/2010 18:16 - Israel
By MissCharlotte - 21/08/2013 04:06 - United States - Downers Grove
Hi everyone, I am the OP. I am so glad this got published!! Also, all of these coments are great :) To add more to the story: My sister and I went out to lunch with my dad because he was in town and wanted to see us. He seemed to have changed since he divorced my mom 15 years ago, so we let him drive us home, which is how he knew where our apartment was. Later that night, I heard noises in our apartment, so my badass sister tackled him and pepper-sprayed him as he was trying to pick up our TV. He was aressted (he actually had a knife) and we are getting a restraining order against him.
By octoberrain - 12/10/2011 15:41 - United States
By blenderbookf - 25/11/2010 18:33 - United States
By Anonymous - 29/07/2012 04:25 - Denmark - Frederiksberg
By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom - Burnham
By Anonymous - 06/11/2015 04:38 - United States - Montpelier
By thoughthewasjoking - 15/08/2014 21:10 - United States - Bessemer
By melean - 04/10/2010 06:37 - Trinidad and Tobago
By thwack - 24/05/2012 18:26 - United States
By :(( - 25/04/2012 18:46 - United States - Saint Petersburg
By Maybe I'll stay longer than spring break. - 31/03/2013 04:34 - United States - Midlothian
By Enni - 27/08/2016 08:47
Keywords
OP here. A little backstory... The vehicle I was driving is my work vehicle- a professional carpet cleaning van. I had driven the van to a job, realized there were no available parking spots to back it into and was thus forced to park it in the street and blocking two vehicles. I pulled the cleaning hoses and supplies to clean the apartment, finished the job, wrapped up and got back into the van. Only then when I shifted to 'drive' did the problem make itself known. Yes, it is an automatic. Not sure as to what was happening mechanically, I called our company's mechanic and it took him over an hour to get to me with the necessary part- a tiny little pin that pulls the shifter between gears and only takes a few minutes to replace without having to take it to a dealership or repair shop. So, in that hour long wait, an old lady came out to drive her vehicle to a store. As luck would have it, her vehicle was one of two that my van was blocking. She asked me to move the van, to which I replied that I couldn't as it was stuck in park. I explained I couldn't even shift it to neutral to push the vehicle out of the way. I explained I was waiting on someone to come help me. That made her day, and she started screaming at me for several minutes. Logic has failed to defuse the situation and since I am not a Vulcan and cannot sleep hold a bitch, I, treasuring the security of this job to provide for my family, chose to then get back into my van, roll up the window, and said "**** it. Time to FML." She left to go back inside after a few minutes. About 20 minutes later, the mechanic showed up, fixed my van, and I was back up and running to finish the day's work.