Intimacy Turn on - FML

Turn on

RuasaLove - 30/07/2015 02:34 - United States - Pleasantville

Today, I was doing laundry while my boyfriend was sitting at the table playing on his phone. I glanced over and caught him watching my ass as I put clothes in the dryer. Trying to be sexy, I looked at him as I slowly bent over to put more clothes in. Instead, I hit my head hard on the dryer door. FML

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The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

Heat of passion

owl + bungee cord - 07/01/2014 20:38 - United States - Herndon

Today, my boyfriend and I were in the shower and things were getting heated. I tried to move position, but slipped and fell, bringing the shower curtain I'd grabbed onto down with me along its support rod. My ass hit the floor just as hard as the rod hit my head. FML

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Smooth operator

Nic - - United States

Today, I put on some skimpy shorts and bent down to get something on the bottom shelf of the fridge to get my boyfriend's attention. On my way up, I slammed my head on the edge of the fridge. FML

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Oh hi!

showerstupid - 04/04/2009 08:04 - United States

Today, my boyfriend was in the shower, and I decided to go join him. I took all my clothes off and stepped into the bathroom. I slipped on some water, and ended up hitting my head on the toilet and passing out. When I came to, I saw my boyfriend's dad looking over me in his towel. Wrong person. FML

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anonymous - 18/12/2010 09:11 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were playing around. He threw me over his shoulder and turned around, smacking my face against the wall. Then he smacked my head into the fridge after turning round to see "what that loud bang" was. FML

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Steamy

Hotdamn - 21/03/2016 04:32 - United States - San Francisco

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting hot and steamy in the shower, until I slipped and fell backwards into the shower curtain, which caused me to hit the back of my head on the toilet seat, and the bar of the shower curtain to land on my throat. FML

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Sick moves, dude

Anonymous - 02/09/2009 09:20 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend and I were having a shower together for the first time. He was trying impress me and did some sort of dance move, he slipped, and when he fell he kicked my leg out causing me to fall and hit my face on the faucet. FML

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Check these out!

elevenharries - 03/06/2010 08:54 - United Kingdom

Today, after staying at my boyfriend's house for the first time, I got in the shower. His bathroom door doesn't lock, so half way through my shower he walked in. Trying to be sexy, I pressed myself up against the glass, which turned out the be a door that opens outwards. I fell on the floor. FML

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Major romcom vibes

staciedee - - United States

Today, my boyfriend thought it would be cute to try and pick me up while kissing, instead he tripped and slammed the back of my head on the corner of the wall. FML

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Wrong sort of poking

Anonymous - 22/09/2013 05:40 - United States - Brandon

Today, my boyfriend got out of the shower and tried to hit my forehead with his penis. He slipped and slapped me in the eye with it. FML

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20lbknockout - 20/10/2009 04:26 - United States

Today, I was exercising, laid on my back, lifting weights over my head. My boyfriend thought it would be funny to casually sit by my feet and suddenly tickle them mercilessly. Caught off guard, I started wiggling, laughed and dropped the weights. On my face. FML

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jayennachristine 23

Thursday 30 July 2015 15:13

Quit banging the dryer and ban him

djcity 11

Thursday 30 July 2015 15:11

Hey who put that there....

Hop6e 22

Thursday 30 July 2015 18:03

At least he was looking at your ass....my boyfriend doesn't do that.

Miss_Whipped 43

Thursday 30 July 2015 19:33

Get some ass to look at! :)

Insanemf18 12

Sunday 16 August 2015 5:26

It's a bad thing, that's your bed doesn't look at your ass? Explain?

SS 31

Thursday 30 July 2015 18:10

I don't understand, how did you hit your head hard if you were bending over slowly?

justsayingbeach 15

Thursday 30 July 2015 18:26

How sad

tiredofwaiting 25

Thursday 30 July 2015 19:10

He probably had a good laugh.

Severefear 7

Thursday 30 July 2015 19:19

How to turn sex into a concussion.

Tannasgh 22

Thursday 30 July 2015 19:26

Still sexy

ShellyLahey 14

Thursday 30 July 2015 19:55

That would so be me if I had a boyfriend and attempted to be sexy.

Madissoni 14

Thursday 30 July 2015 20:33

I thought it said brother and I was like oh hell no

chuchusheep 19

Thursday 30 July 2015 20:39

happens to the best of us.

ChristinePi 36

Thursday 30 July 2015 20:44

Next time don't try to be sexy, just be sexy! But seriously OP this is probably something you guys will laugh about it you don't already . It's cute.

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Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, I was walking my dog when he stopped in the middle of the street and took a dump. I looked around furtively but saw nobody, so I just kept walking. I stepped in it on the way back home. FML

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Today, as a prank, my friends put a big bucket of water on my door so that it would spill on me as I exited my room. It would have been funny if I hadn't been holding my $900 laptop as I was walking out. FML

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Today, I found out that one of the students at my old school had committed suicide. Several months earlier, I'd informed the school counselor that said student appeared to be suicidal. Apparently, teachers dismissing her as "lazy" when she was actually very, very depressed was a big factor. Man, fuck that school. FML

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Today, my boss asked me if I could work on Valentine's Day because there was no chance of me having a date. She's right. FML

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Today, I saw the guy I was seeing four months ago, who lives in another state, hand in hand with a girl at the mall. The same one who told me he "doesn’t do long distance." I went up to them, confronted him about it, and demanded to know why her and not me. He pretended not to know me and threatened to call security. FML

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Today, I was on the train when I fell asleep. Everything would have been fine but I was suddenly jerked awake by the very loud sound of my own fart, followed by the stares of many strangers. FML

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