Transportation Splish splash

Splish splash

Anonymous - 20/04/2009 06:27 - United States

Today, I used the bathroom on a bus from New York to Boston, and carefully covered the seat with twenty of the single-square toilet paper rations. As I was peeing, the bus flew over a bump and swerved sharply, and my entire naked bottom was splashed with urine and poop. It wasn't my own. FML

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The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

Ihatebuses - 14/06/2018 19:00

Today, while getting on a city bus, I sat down on a urine-soaked seat. FML

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Anonymous - 02/04/2016 13:38 - United States

Today, the coach bus I was riding almost crashed. I was using the restroom at the time. The bus braked so hard, I peed all over the wall and splashed my shirt. Nobody wanted to sit anywhere near me after that. FML

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Oh dear - 05/07/2012 22:15 - Saint Vincent and the Grenadines - Kingstown

Today, I was taking a dump at a public restroom. As I reached over to grab the toilet paper, I realized someone had peed on it. FML

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Anonymous - 04/09/2010 19:16 - United States

Today, I was on a plane when I suddenly felt the need to use the toilet. I didn't make it in time and I had to spend the remainder of my trip in soiled clothes. FML

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Anonymous - 04/04/2011 05:26

Today, I had diarrhea in a public bathroom. When I was finished, I noticed that someone had pissed all over the toilet paper. FML

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FailedTraveller - 04/07/2018 15:00

Today, I took a long distance train across country. Early on I had an urgent need to use the bathroom. As I went to flush away the nasty, the preflush water violently projected my diarrhoea onto my pants before clearing the rest down the gurgler. I have 8 hours left on the train. FML

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Noname - 12/03/2009 11:09 - Australia

Today, I was on a standing on a crowded bus going home after school. A wriggling 5 year old boy and his mum left the seat to get off the bus. Since no one looked keen to sit on the seat, I did, only to find out that it was covered in pee. FML

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Flying disaster

Anonymous - 24/03/2023 14:00 - United Kingdom - Manchester

Today, I was on a plane when I had to use the bathroom. While pulling up my pants, the flush button got stuck and the water kept running. I tried to fix it, but ended up flooding the bathroom and the aisle. The attendants had to give me a towel and escort me back to my seat with everyone on the plane staring at me. FML

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Emergency situation

Anonymous - - United Kingdom

Today, I was on a crowded bus on the way back from my boyfriend's when I suddenly had a terrible nose bleed. I had no tissues, so instead I had to use last night's underwear from my bag. FML

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Fast and Furious

TooQuick - 27/04/2016 12:19 - Mozambique - Maputo

Today, after a 2-hour meeting, I rushed to take an urgent dump. Unbeknownst to me, my urine was not hitting the porcelain bowl, but rather the underside of the lid. As it pooled around the pedestal, it soaked my pants, underwear, and when I stood up to button my pants, it got on my shirt too. FML

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ForestFire0 1

Monday 20 April 2009 16:35

The irony here is that if you hadn't wasted time with the TP seat cover, you would have been done and out of the bathroom before the bump.

Rok_fml 0

Monday 20 April 2009 16:36

I hate public toilets D:

housemd1120 0

Monday 20 April 2009 16:50

You should have gone before you left

notmuch 0

Monday 20 April 2009 16:54

It was your first time on the Fung Wah bus, wasn't it?

spamme 0

Monday 20 April 2009 16:55

AMAGAD! you sure it was urine? maybe it was just the chemicals

ivdrscg 2

Monday 20 April 2009 16:55

hover.

maddog_fml 0

Monday 20 April 2009 16:58

Yek!! Just Yek!! #1 Congrats, now growup! #6 LOL :)

livigurl100 0

Monday 20 April 2009 16:58

I'm sorry, that's awful, but at least urine is sterile.

guitardedman 0

Monday 20 April 2009 17:05

you can't hold it from ny to boston? i mean i guess thats not much your fault but thats not a long trip... at least flush the thing before you use it failure of common sense

BlackBlazeCobra 16

Saturday 17 March 2012 10:59

Depending on where you're coming from, it can be a long trip. I live in the lower part of New York and I had a class trip to Boston in the 8th grade. With those buses it took about 4-5 hours. It's hard to hold it that long for some people.

bobbinika 1

Monday 20 April 2009 17:10

uhh bus toilets do flush... just like airplanes..

Ohnoitslindsay 0

Monday 20 April 2009 17:14

And this, ladies, is why it's not worth the trouble to line the toilet seat before sitting down. No one has ever died from sitting on the same seat that someone else sat on. If it bothers you so much, carry some antibacterial wipes. :)

ffpoisongirl 0

Monday 20 April 2009 17:34

That's why you HOVER! If people in other countries can pop a squat over their hole in the ground type toilets (which are difficult for Americans to master), then you can hover a few inches off the seat of the toilet and aim.