Spiders, Scary Animals SPIDERS!

SPIDERS!

Anonymous - - United States

Today, while cleaning out my garage, I found a pregnant spider. I couldn't step on the spider without releasing the baby spiders, so I went inside to get a glass jar to trap it. While trying to relocate the spider, I accidentally stepped on it. I now have a bunch of baby spiders roaming around. FML

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The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

Creeped out

NotASpiderMan - - United States - Seattle

Today, as I was changing my sheets, I found a huge spider under my pillow. My 10 year-old sister had to get rid of it for me. FML

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Demon child

PeanutlyDisabled - - France

Today, I was babysitting a new child. I guess she heard me tell her parents about my severe peanut allergy because she got a jar out of the pantry, spread it all over the stairs leading to where her fort was, and walked around with a baseball bat covered in it so I couldn't come near her. FML

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Snek

snakeboy - - Australia

Today, for the first time in about 3 years, I decided to clean my car. It was going really well until I looked down at what I was about to pick up. On the back seat floor lay a dead snake, which at one point, for God knows how long, was living in my car while I unknowingly drove it around. FML

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Neil Diamond was wrong

LucyLollipop -

Today, I had my first glass of red wine after months of pregnancy and giving birth. Just as I sat down and started to relax, I spilled it all over myself and my in-law’s couch. FML

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Bad boy

Shiva - - France - Niort

Today, I cleaned my apartment from top to bottom. Once I was done, I looked over at my puppy, who then woke up, stretched, got out of his basket and started to pee. I shouted, "No!" Scared, he then ran all over the place, still peeing. FML

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Caught off guard

dooommage - - France

Today, I was teasing my cat with a piece of string when suddenly my phone rang. I answered it with one hand and put the string down with the other onto my lap. The beast seized the opportunity to spring, claws out, onto my privates. FML

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Brain fog

FlyingCoffeeMonster - - United States - Oreland

Today, I was having my morning coffee while getting ready for work. I grabbed clothes off the floor to throw in the hamper. I accidentally threw my full coffee instead. FML

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Customized

gss - - United States

Today, I pulled one of my favorite hoodies out of my closet, and immediately noticed several large stains on it. Apparently, my dad had managed to open a hole in the roof and couldn't be bothered to patch it, so a squirrel got in and used my closet as a litter box. FML

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Hang in there

ouch - - United States - Wilmington

Today, I was on the toilet when my cat came in and jumped up on the sink. Apparently my lap looked like a comfier seat, so she jumped onto it. She misjudged the distance, but luckily caught herself by sliding to a stop, with her claws in my bare thighs. FML

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New nickname just dropped

Anonymous - - United States - Midland

Today, I was talking with a very attractive coworker outside when a moth flew into my ear. I started screaming and hitting my ear because it was stuck and alive in my ear. I spent the rest of the day at the ER. I'm forever known as The Moth Lady. FML

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bethan1 4

Sunday 31 October 2010 12:42

For some reason I read this as "I found a pregnant sister" it was way cooler that way.

Lounia_fml 8

Sunday 31 October 2010 15:05

At 18 :P

yummycupcakegirl 0

Sunday 31 October 2010 15:11

happy Halloween;) to u!

BULLET2246 0

Sunday 31 October 2010 15:14

I like Lil wayne

christa953 12

Sunday 31 October 2010 15:22

it's perfect for Halloween!!! muhahaha

Sam_13161821 0

Sunday 31 October 2010 15:23

Why are you freaking out...? Its your garage, not your house. I have spiders all over my garage. & other stuff too. So does everyone else I know.

23kstrife23 0

Sunday 31 October 2010 15:35

I agree with 19. unfortunately you're an idiot. spiders don't give live birth rather, they lay eggs. Liar....

BlargHonk 0

Sunday 31 October 2010 15:48

Spiders do not work that way. You fail biology forever, OP. In other words, FAKE!

TaylorTotsYumm 10

Sunday 31 October 2010 15:55

Holy ******* shit, people. Uhh duh.. kan spyderz qet preqnent? Okay, so I heard, there's this new thing called the Internet. Yeah, sick name, right? Well, on it, you can check out cool facts and actually ask it questions. AND IT ANSWERS THEM. I kid you not, people. So, I encourage you ignorant folks, who have no idea about the processes different spiders go through to make babies, to check out this so called Internet (specifically Google) and maybe learn something.