Love Not so anal retentive then… - FML

Not so anal retentive then…

Anonymous - 03/02/2017 22:00 - United Kingdom - Hull

Today, after finally breaking up with my controlling girlfriend, she took a shit in my socks. FML

8 366

747

Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. …

Wronged - 21/09/2009 10:53 - Singapore

Today, my girlfriend decided to break up with me because she found a bra in my cupboard. It was hers. FML

45 548

3 578

skrewedguy - 08/12/2011 03:33 - United States

Today, my girlfriend left me. Knowing that I am a germaphobe, she took all of my cleaning supplies and spread mud and trash everywhere. FML

33 710

6 627

That one weird friend

MsSmellyFeet - 16/11/2022 04:00 - United States - Bedford

Today, my friend and I went back to my house after a gym session. After I took my shoes and socks off in the foyer, I told her to wait while I brought some post-workout smoothies. I came back to find her sniffing my socks. She stared back at me for a bit, said, "Uh, catch ya later", and left with my socks. FML

886

140

Morning surprise

JayBausch - 17/08/2009 20:48 - United States

Today, I went to retrieve my sneakers that my wife made me leave outside the door of our hotel room. Somebody had shat in one of them. FML

51 776

7 072

CHStennis_4 - 03/09/2011 04:48 - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Because she farted, and thought it was "too awkward". FML

41 330

3 868

whysheheartless - 03/11/2009 07:24 - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. By making out with her new boyfriend in front of me. FML

43 933

3 071

Dodged a bullet

Anonymous - 22/10/2022 04:00

Today, I went through the stuff that I'd left at my ex’s place and started unpacking it. I found a pair of another girl's panties. We broke up a little over a week ago. FML

782

170

Santa or Satan?

Cat poo - 23/12/2024 16:00 - United States - Smithtown

Today, I woke up, put on my fuzzy socks, walked down my hallway, and stepped in cat vomit. I took off my now wet socks, continued walking down the hallway, and stepped barefoot in cat shit. FML

435

216

Anonymous - 03/12/2012 11:53 - Canada

Today, I told my girlfriend that I'm breaking up with her because she's very abusive. After a couple of seconds of awkward silence, she kicked me in the nuts and ran away. FML

33 116

4 201

Anonymous - 27/09/2013 20:33 - United States - Spring Branch

Today, I broke up with my abusive girlfriend. She responded by breaking into my place and stabbing my hamster with a fork. FML

80 040

4 559

chudun 18

Friday 3 February 2017 22:10

Sock her ass, she sounds like a piece of shit.

cheeology 22

Friday 3 February 2017 22:07

how does one shit in a sock? I think you need to fight fire with fire and shit on her door step OP, add glitter for a nice touch.

niallo 23

Friday 3 February 2017 23:43

If that's all it cost you, you did alright. You hear horror stories about some of these bad breakups. Count yourself lucky and move on. Also, change the locks so she doesn't try and do it again.

_fakebelieve 9

Friday 3 February 2017 23:50

That shit socks!

squizzlebee 19

Friday 3 February 2017 23:55

That's some impressive aim

dabomsht123 3

Saturday 4 February 2017 0:18

Take the shit-filled socks stick em in a brown lunch bag put em on her step and light that ****** on fire. Lol

19foxy81 8

Saturday 4 February 2017 0:21

Sounds like a shitty situation :(

Devolution 8

Saturday 4 February 2017 0:55

How did she...nvm

foreverxxi 0

Saturday 4 February 2017 1:04

Good riddance. Now what you need to do is find a pair of gloves and smear it on her car.

RichardPencil 30

Saturday 4 February 2017 1:43

You mean she filled several socks with one turd each or did she pop a squat in your sock drawer. In either case, that's excellent control.

mitch2161998 6

Saturday 4 February 2017 1:45

sounds like a shitty situation.

mermaidgirle 12

Saturday 4 February 2017 14:44

How about no

anthony99 14

Saturday 4 February 2017 5:07

Fake, everyone knows girls don't poop

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Awkward Pokémon Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, I was cutting a client's hair, and she was complaining about how itchy her head was from having it too long. As I lay down my comb and shears, three lice bugs ran across my counter. FML

49 976

3 801

Today, I got home from work a little late due to bad traffic. My wife kissed me, then flew into a rage and swore that I had the taste of penis on my lips, accusing me of cheating on her with a guy. Apparently she got this insane "test your man" idea from some Cosmo-type magazine. FML

50 195

3 290

Today, I got back home after I decided on a whim to embark on a solo adventure in the Australian Outback. My truck got stranded due to rising floodwaters, and I was stuck for days without communication. Rescue finally came, but now I'm reconsidering any solo further trips. FML

176

444

Today, I found out my new husband is actually an illegal immigrant using me for citizenship, and is now forcing me to house his parents, 5 siblings, and 3 grandparents who are now able to pass through immigration. FML

5 639

2 131

Today, after close to 10 years of marriage, my wife’s health has improved enough she is craving sex again. Just not with me. FML

1 603

141

Today, I got called a racist because I refused to sell a woman a bunch of rather large 4-inch goldfish for a 10-gallon aquarium. These fish get 10 inches long and she wanted 20 of them. Essentially, she screamed at me for a half-hour, asking to speak to my manager. I'm the manager. She called corporate. FML

1 860

133